Happy New Year!

There goes another year into pages of history.



Another year unfolds,
New paths we have to tread.
We wonder what life holds
In the brand new year ahead.

My special wish just for you
Is a blessing from God above,
To make this your happiest year,
Filled with joy and peace and love.

Happy New Year to all.

Another one bites the dust.....

Dear Readers,

Please Welcome, Shashank

Ashish loves the sunrise. He makes it a point to watch that time before the sun rises. The sun slowly pops up, killing the New York chill during winters, sprinkling warmth through the windows.! Wow! It just fires! And that's when he looks behind him and finds his wife, Shruti, still asleep.

She is a Media Professional, with a Masters Degree in Advertising and Public Relations to her credit. But she's turning into a Writer. She, when in harmony and her heart in tune, can create a wonderful sunrise and sunset with her pen. She's adept with words. But lately her mood has been different. Married for three years now, she gets herself to tune into human wavelengths.

"It's so difficult after marriage", she jotted. 'Human wavelengths and behavioural patterns' get so complicated after marriage, she continued. The eternal truth is that each is right in his/her way and yet the Herculean arguments dn't end. You want to be understood and so does ur partner, and in the process the process of understanding oneself is forgotten. Is that what marriage is all about??

"It's just not abt love and romance; It's about companionship. You have a companion and yet you feel lonely. But there is something that keeps a marriage going. Something powerful than the barefaced facts. It's the absolute contenment of not haven spoken a single word, in a horribly crowded street, and still feel the presence of the other person that you love and miss the most. And I am happy I am married", she wrote further.

Ashish reads the lines and says, "God! These lines are so contradictory! Wonder whether you are cursing marriage or praising it. From what I can gather and understand, you are just trying to potray it as a happy concept, since you are in it and cannot run away from it".

"You have the ability to read me so well, Ashish", said Shruti and smiled. "It's cause I am your husband and I know you more than you think I do", he came up to her and kissed her on her forehead.

"Can you fix breakfast soon, I need to go to work early today", said Ashish. "A woman's supression starts from here!, shruti screams. Y don't u make breakfast today and feed me too", she said. "I can't work at my will, like the way you do. Boss will fire me if I am late", he teases her.

Start of the day for Mr.and Mrs. Shah.

Ashish is a software professional. Work is his passion. He's lost when he's in work and works for 26 hrs a day. He is clear that he needs a wife who sticks to home since his job is highly pressurised, which unfortunately was not the case before marriage and he had promised Shruti that she can work after marriage. And so Shruti had to give away her job and makes sure she reminds Ashish of her 'sacrifice' atleast once a day! And so habituated is Ashish, he xtends more than a lending ear to all of it. Shruti loves writing and Ashish encourages her. As of now, that's all he can afford to do, neways.

Shruti has this beautiful quality in finding light in the darkest corners. She introspects and catches hold of the purpose that any situation creates however worse it looks on the surface. That has taught her to be less dependent on Ashish, who is so busy building his career and has no time for his family.

But they both have a common goal. A happy home. And so each try and give more than what they can to maintain the peace and harmony. The write up that Shruti started is one of the most commenst of moods that waver in almost every human mind.

'It's the contenment of marriage. You don't feel you are making sacrifices, even when you are'. 'Priorites are adjusted, flexibility is enhanced and humility is respected.'

'Marriage has something sacred and deeper in it'. I just dn't regret being married, she says finally.

Mental compatibility and human wavelengths, their affilitaion and timings, only GOD gets it right!!

Merry Christmas!

Tagged by Anonymous.

Me 10 years ago…



At this time, was preparing for 11th std. exams. Had absolutely no idea what to do with chemistry. Have always hated that subject eva since my school days.



Me 5 years ago...



I was at my first job.



Last year…



At this time, was coping up with the biggest earth shattering event of my life. I learnt how a few decisions or any problem of that magnitude can shake up your world ruining up your sense of security and balance. With trust shattered and self-respect put to task, had felt so disoriented. Happy that those times have past by.



Yesterday…



Promised myself to embark on a new life. Concentrating on "ME". I can say with conviction that I'm happy things turned out the way it did. Helped me grow as an individual. Thank God for these blessings.



5 things that drive me crazy:



Red Roses (I adore 'em).

Chocolates (especially Ferrero, Dairy Milk and Bounty).

Chocolate Pastries (Yum!).

Ice-Creams (all flavours).

Bags (I have bags of all sizes).



5 people I miss so much:



Arjun (my nephew. He's my dahling.)

Sheetal (One of my best frnds in college. Married and settled in Canada).

Dee (my best frnd from school. Married and settled in Baroda).

S (I put up a brave face and smile fondly at the fond memories of a time that has long gone. Hope blessed things come your way..each day).

Sana (She's away in B'glore. She is, the wind beneath my wings).



5 things I remember by heart:



All my fav. songs (in full).

Phone numbers of all the people whose call I dn't want to attend..eva!.

Phone nunbers of all my friends staying outside India.

DOB's of all my friends. (I am known to neva miss anyone's budday).

That day - 16th August 1999.



5 places I escape to:



Crosswords.

Any coffee shop.

Beach.

Any shopping mall.

On the couch.



5 things I hate when people do this:



Be late.

Fail to keep promises.

Lie.

Hurt.

Pretend.



5 favorite things in the closet:



Black denim jeans.

White Armani T-shirt.

Blue denim skirt.

Brown leather bag picked up from UK.

Watch.



5 things ‘love doing:



Cooking.

Reading.

Shopping.

Writing.

Travelling.



5 most valued intangible things:



Life.

Communication.

Trust.

Friendship.

Character.



5 things I enjoy:



Music.

Movies.

Blogging.

Talking / Chatting.

Fitness / Exercising.



5 bloggers I would like to tag…



Anyone can take this tag.....

Dedicated to one of my bestest friend.

Friends claim to know you better than you know yourself. You know what? They sometimes do.

"No matter who broke your heart or how long it takes to heal, you'll never get through it without your friends" - Carrie Bradshaw in Sex and The City.

I agree with her. It's true. Some say you can get through anything if you truly try. But wudn't you be that much colder, more bitter and much more self-pitying? This is what friends do. They soften blows, offer (unsolicited, sometimes) advice and hold an umbrella over your head so you don't get hit by the rubble when your world collapses around you. They might not be able to help, might not even understand, but somehow, they make things better...by just being there.

And V is one of them. I have always marveled at the fact that our friendship has survived our disparate mindsets. We knew we are worlds apart, but were binded by an inexplicable connection; we can talk about everything under the sun, neve judging each other on the kind of life we lead. She brings outa different side of me and I have learnt a lot of things from her world.

I trust my life with her. She's one of the few whom I can call at 3:00 AM in a crisis and know that she'll be out the door and on her way to me even before I hang up the phone. She laughs when I am happy, has shed tears when I am hurt and calls me an IDIOT when I need to hear it. She's neva judged me and hears those things which I, sometimes am afraid of saying. She's a treasure, and as treasures go, they are rare. So is she. She represents that part of my life that I am not afraid of. SHE'S GETTING MARRIED AND MOVING TO CANADA.

I thank God for YOU. For

Running with me, pushing people aside, and getting into the gents compartment.
Making me eat pizza that tasted like cardboard, so my stomach wouldn't growl in the night.
Pampering me when I had a minor attack of flu.
Extending the time we spend together by two hrs, everytime electing to take the next train.
For making good lemon tea and delicious breakfast, everytime I stayed over at your house.
All the times we gosspied abt old classmates, your boyfriend-going-to-be-husband, relatives, old habits and new jobs.
All the times we teased each other incessantly.
Putting up with my addiction to have the fan on..no matter what the temperature is.
Jumping and yelling your guts out loud on the sight of a cockroach, also scaring the hell outta me.
Making a picnic out of a regula bus/train ride.

We've prayed together,
We've fought together,
Walked away together,
Met up with each others spiritual needs,
Have shopped, shared, hurt, heal and joked together.

We share a special bond. Which is unique to us. You have been with me, every step, every day ---I love you and u'd missed a damn lot!

Another lesson of love...from the deepest closet.

Life and it's experiences cant turn you into a philosopher.



Quote Claude Wooldridge in Louis Buss's Luxury of Exile:



The end of a relationship is the negative copy of its beginning. there is the same feeling of unreality as when you have just fallen in love, the same loss of appetite and sleep. The strange numbness, like the shock after an accident, is exactly the same. A relationship is a holiday from loneliness, beginning and ending in the same airport. The most awful thing about the end is that it clearly reminds you of the beginning, of the joy with which you set off, everything is the same, yet everything has been inverted by grief.



I wonder what makes people what they are. Is it fruitless to expect change in them? Are we destined to be born as an exception, amongst the general fraternity of people who are unemotional, cold, unfeeling and uncaring? I don't believe that. I am sure there are people in this world who think like the way we do. To whom sensitivity, kindness, care, concern, compassion and understanding mean just as much as they do to you. Then why is it that we neva come across people like ourselves?



I know of people who are in love and cannot, for some or the other reason, cannot declare it. It's sucha lousy situation to be in. My heart sure does go out to them. But there are a certain set of people I pity a lot. The ones who are loved, those who are thought of and are cared for. Those whose smallest gestures make for a smile in someone's life, those whose mere presence is sheer joy and whose voice is like music. They are the ones who have a place in someone's heart, but don't know what they have. Those who break the same very hearts that ache for them. Those who do not feel the hurt and see the tears that follow their unkind words. Those who are offered comfort and reassurances, but don't care at all. Those who are consoled when needed to lift their spirits, but who spurn them in an act of pride. Those who ask/demand tokens of love and the need to be made to feel special, but have a problem in accepting it.



These are the most unfortunate people. They are given a chance to be loved, but who will not and cannot.



People like flowers do come, the lucky one gets to be with you always, the others just wilt away. Outside of obsession, the real world is a very happy world. Because people change, time passes, the heart grows wider, and room is made for something, someone new. We value a person only after we have lost them. Nuthing lasts foreva. But till the time it is..lets make it beautiful and worthwhile. Lets give and make the most of the hearts that care for us.

I ate an entire bar of dark rich chocolate tday. Just like that.

Dear Calories,

You can stick on to me tday, thou will be burnt tommorrow.

I wud make my epitaph read as, "Calories today, gone tommorrow".

For once I am not cribbing.

And I also spoke to Dee after ages. Spoke to her of things I can only tell her. Girlfriends just ROCK!

Hope you guys had a lovely weekend.

When there is someone....

We all grow emotional at times, don't we? How wud it be to pour all your troubles, anxities, fears, problems and worries into the heart of another person? And finding a responding chord?

How delighted wud one feel to be secured in the knowledge that no matter what the world thinks of you, there is this one person who believes in you and that you can depend upon their judgement, love and loyalty. Fingers that entwine with yours, assuring of you being good, when there are fingers being pointed out at you. For every person who finds nuthing but flaws and faults in you, there is this one person who knows your worth and also makes you realize it. Who loves you overlooking all your flaws. That when I am blamed for doing wrong, someone to tell you that you learn from your misakes and that I wud have neva known it was wrong unless I did it.

I know I have someone to turn on to, when I need to discuss my ideas or express my feelings, besides my blog. That my problem will not be "mine", but "ours" after I discussed it and that WE together wud find a solution for it. My every gesture wud be acknowledged and rewarded with an equal gesture, not out of expectation but out of love, care and concern. That when my heart is heavy and the world beneath my feet has slipped away, the world wudn't care any less, but someone does care. That when something tragic happens in ma life, I have a shoulder to cry on. Someone who eases the pain and wud cry with me if need arises.

How emotional can one be? Isn't this the stuff that dreams are made of? We feel like a small child marooned on an island looking for a parent. Some find and get. Some dn't. The ones who find are just so God damn lucky. The ones who dn't find make peace with themselves. They learn to survive alone. They learn to trust and find love, comfort and solace in themselves. No one can be a better friend than oneself. You know what lies within you; you are precious. You can only be sorry for that someone who neva took possession of it.

Blog-O-Mine.

I've always been a very private person, except with the people who are near and dear to me. But since I created this blog, I've become more open about my views. I receive the greatest satisfaction when I read the comments. It's wonderful to know that people not only visit your blog, read your posts, have thought about what you have written and have taken out time to acquaint you with their ideas and opinions. It gives me great pleasure and I look forward to comments from people everytime I pen something down.

On my way back from work today, I was thinking....what if you were to market/promote your blog? What punchline woud you have? What woud be your USP?. Marketing has neva been my cuppa chai. I am one of those who wudn't know how to sell a heater to an Eskimo!! My recommendations can get anyone to be suspectible! For eg. If I were to say, "If you like reading, then visit my blog, and if you like what you read, keep reading". I am afraid, it mite sound like, "My blog's great, you need to visit once to believe it.". Huh! Just not me. Sounds so flattery!

This blog has become personal to me. I feel a sense of ownership. I am possessive about it and cherish it with all my other cherished possessions. I feel like a plant without being watered, when I dn't post anything on it for days. I wud neva want my this little plant to eva fade away. I aim to nuture it and make it a tree, with people who comment as my strong branches. Tho' I am not in the best of health these days, my energy wud neva fail me....

Has your life worked out the way you wanted it to? Do you know anyone whose life has worked the way they planned or expected? A segment of ma life, by sheer chance, has gone the way I expected it to. But it neva lasted forever.The other times when I insisted that it go the way I have planned, I wasn't confident enuf that it was indeed the right way it shud go.



I have neva met anyone whose life has gone they way they planned or hoped and who is content with the outcome. Apart from the privileged few who have in every way managed to get the desired outcome from life. Have you eva thought, Why do we pay such a high price in terms of being alive in lieu for the success of our plans and expectations from life.?



Life hardly ever works out the way we expect it to and majority of our life's plans turn out differently, if not completely opposite, than we imagine. Should you be grateful for this?



Life is ordinary, but it also is wild, adventurous and with lots of surprises. If we were to get all that we asked for, our intelligence would always be underdeveloped and we would use less than 10% of our mental capacity to be situated where we are today. Everything would be nice....but would that BE life??



We all have expectations and they differ for different people. Our ideal blueprint reads of high standards in life, which most of us would neva admit. Irrespective of whether they are reasonable or not, we cannot refrain from placing our expectations and neither can we plan our life.



Have you noticed how even when everything else in your life is perfect, you still tend to get hung up about certain things that are NOT right?



I have decided to proceed with my list of expectations, longer than Sushmita Sen's legs, with all passion, vigour, will and effort. I will simultaneously also learn to acknowledge the inevitability of their failure to turn out the way I desired. I'd wait to see what I am given, and will diligently accept wat is offered.



Oh well. Life.

Emotionally Stripped.

'V' is inconsolable. Just don't know how to comfort her. My best attempts seem artificial. She is staring at the ground like a ghost.

"Another r'ship ended, " she says.

"Damn, I neva learn from my mistakes. I keep always falling for the wrong guy", she cries out loud.

I give her the answers I've been told, but they lack conviction.

"You always jump into a r'ship". "You attach urself emotionally too soon", I say.

"How else do u love someone"??. "Isn't that the way to love"? she asks.

"That's NOT the only way, 'V'", I tell her.

"Now"?, she looks at me and asks

I have no answers. I am helpless too. What do I tell you? The answers that I know works only for the rest of the world and not for me.

"Where is the right guy"?, she looks at me and asks with red swollen eyes.

"He doesn't exist, V", I tell her. "'Cause there is no "RIGHT" guy"!!

"The concept of "right" and "perfect" is just all in the head.", I add further.

Priorities, shared dreams, the ability to understand and adjust, growing up together, doing things together are the main most important ingredients to a long lasting r'ship. The rest just fall apart.

"Just move on", I told her. That was all I cud advise her.

We live through self-fulfilling prophecies everyday and each moment of our lives. We manifest failure in some form and then hear us say to ourselves, "I knew, this was bound to happen". We can succeed if we sincerely want to. We make our lives a series of reruns and repetions. If we want to, we can make each day a brand new show.

Our lives may have had "more than your share" of trials and tribulations, but is there any point in sitting and sulking? Is it gng to make situations better for you? It is gng to get you out of misery? You have to LET GO! So what if the person you loved dumped you for someone else? So what if he/she neva cared for your feelings? So what if he/she took you for granted? So what if you failed in the past? It's the past.

V, change your expectations, your thoughts. Stop expecting disappointments and let-downs at every corner. Start living each day joyously. Put a smile in your heart, however shaky that smile may be. Don't be afraid of the past or of the future.

Every day is a new day and you have to make it a complete new start.

The present is for you to discover. It's completely upto you. Live it up, babe!

If you have love in your life, it can make up for a great many things that are missing. If you don't have love in your life, no matter what else there is, it's not enough.

-- Ann Landers.



I agree.

A time to be thankful....

We fail to thank God for the simple joys and pleasures HE gives us. Let's all take this oppourtinity to think of the things we do each day, the people we take for granted. You might have more reasons and things to be thankful for.



I am thankful for...



~Not getting all that I deserve, you neva know what I deserve maybe worse than what I got.



~To be able to see things as they might be than the way thay are.



~All my needs that are met, in the way different than what I had expected.



~All the times when I have been termed wrong. It's given me oppourtinities to prove otherwise.



~The best things that are free. I now have money to spend on other good things.



~All those people who love and care for me, in the way they can.



~All those good, bad and ugly memories of days gone by. They've strengthened me and helped me to be the girl I am today.



~All those choices I've made, good or bad, and the lessons I learned from the bad ones.



~All those extra pounds I put on. It only means I've seen very few hungry days.



~The next breath I'd take. It will give me time to post this.



~All you lovely people who'd spend time reading this post.

Of Men and a "Proper" Good-Bye!

"How can you just hang up like that", I said to him.

"But you said "BYE", he said. "And a BYE means an end to a conversation, isn't it", he adds.

"Huh", I say and hang up.

I feel an "incompleteness" if I cannot end a conversation (via any medium) without a "proper good-bye". For me a "proper good-bye" means having to say some words or sentences with it and after it. Wimmen share some kinda delicateness towards a "good-bye" and more often than not, u'd notice that a conversation between two wimmen woud last much longer even after the actual good-bye has been said. They'd still have a lot to say even after that. :D

But when it's a conversation between a man and a woman (like between me and S tday), and the man who is not aware of the woman's sensitivity towards this matter, naturally bears the brunt..just like 'S' did. :D...

I said a good-bye and was wanting to say something more to him, when I am shocked to hear the line go dead. I hear the phone disconnect. He's not there at the other end. That beast..hung up after having said a good-bye and "assuming" that the conversation is over. Cudn't he wait for a minute longer?? How rich would his service provider get if he were to wait for a minute more? I called him up and told him that he was wrong in hanging up without a proper good-bye.

"Proper good-bye", what on earth is that, now??, he said.

"I dn't quite get it", adds further.

"Proper good-bye means NOT having to keep the phone immediately after I say "bye"", I say.

"I had something more to say but you just cudn't wait", I told him.

"If you had somethng to say, then y did u say "BYE" in the first place"??, he asks.

"God, wimmen are just so damn difficult to understand"!!, he laments

"Nopes, we are not". "You guys are just so insensitive", I blast at him.

"Ok. We'd do it this way, from next time onwards after u say "BYE", I'd ask, "May I keep the phone now", he suggests. "After you permit, I shall hang up"

"Brilliant", I say.

I can hear him smile.

"May I hang up, now"

"Yes".

"Ta-ta"

Men are from Mars, INDEED! ;-) :D

"We are friends and always shall remain", is what he told her.



The most heart-breaking line in the simple (or otherwise) history of break-ups. It came her way, too.



"Dammit, I can't just be friends with you"! She wanted to scream. "You know what I feel for you and having been through so much already, how the hell can you even think of something like that??", she wanted to ask him.



"Ok", is all that she mumbled. That's all she cud say. She didn't have any choice, anyways.



"I can't forsee anyone else in my life and that seperating from you would elude me", she wanted to tell him. She had so much to say to him. But it wudn't make him any difference. She knew that. He had made up his mind. He didn't want anything but friendship from her.



People who were in a binding r'ship earlier, the concept of them being friends after the r'ship is jeopardized, needs to be clarified to me. Even if they went out together (as friends), what would u call it? "Hanging" around or a date? Since the r'ship rights have now been revoked, what is the probability of them talking to each other? How often would they see each other? Where would they draw the line? How should she react when he introduces her to his new "girl-friend" or a potential wifey? So many complex situations.....which need simple answers.



Not wanting to make things worse between them or confront him, she never dared challenge him about it. He never feigned any moderate amount of kindness when he spoke to her, even for her sake. For all the times they shared together. Her misery compounded two-by-four when she discussed this with her new "friend" (earlier boy-friend), he resisted all her efforts, said things about the past that were not relevant and evidenced no particular interest in her. She couldn't bear the "chilling" out on the r'ship, that now had turned into friendship. She was too hassled and got deeper and involved herself too much into things he said.



And finally, he lashed the final N-bomb on her, there's someone else in his life. He talks about their r'ship, about their mutual understandings, their (in)compatibility, et al. Listening to him talking abt his g-f (read as would-be wife) made her feel something, she cudn't exactly place her finger on the emotion. Sadness? Jealousy??....He kept telling her a lot of things, things that her mind din't want to hear. He showed her his wud-be-wife's pics, spoke about their marriage plans..etc. All she could thing was, his wife.... once-upon-a-time she had hoped to covet that position in his life. It felt a lil' odd hearing him talking abt some other woman taking that position. She said, "I am happy for you" with tears streaming down her eyes. That's also what he expected out of her. "You now move on", is what he told her in return.



When the feeling sank in, she realized that she was not happy for him. She wanted him to be hers. She never wanted to be friends with him. She was not deficit of friends in her life. She always had more than friendship on her mind - when it came to him. Always had a garland in her head.



Which is the best way to handle a break-up? Certain set of people say that the break-up shud be clean. You then pick up the peices (read as debris), wave a good-bye, cut all ties and neva look back again. Some say that being "friends" make way for a smoother transition which reduces a fair amount of the pain. How? Can someone pls explain this funda?



How you deal with break-ups, according to me, solely depends on the factors involved for the break-up and the feeling of both the people during that time. If it is mutual, then yes, you can be friends. But can break-ups eva be mutual? If one feels for the other, the friendship would be at the cost of a major heartace for one of the 2 involved.



Wot do u say? Can 2 people be friends or want to be friends, after they've had a close r'ship.??

Looked for you in your crib....you were not there.
Searched for you at my bed-side...you were not there.
Called for you as I reached home from work..you did not come crawling to me.
No one to sing to "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" today.
No one who'd sleep in my arms today.

I am terribly missing you.

'A' says my formulas on love are twisted. He says my fundamentals are complicated.!!! Just 'cause he doesn't relate to my "fundas", does it mean that they are illogical?? Bull-shit!!!



All (read as Most) of us have fallen in love at some point in time. Some might still be in love or will be someday.



Love and hurt, Love and Tears, Love won, Love lost, Stupid love, Love across distance, Young love, Old love, Romatic love, Eternal love....



I've grown up reading Mills and Boons and still read them sometimes. Have also heard intervies on love, people praising it and have had numerous discussions with friends and family in gatherings. What I have realized is that love is sweet and sour rolled into one. So strange! Love is all about getting pampered, to be cared for, being happy, feeling cute, adored, adored and nice. It's about bestowing on another the most precious gift we have to offer: joys, our understandings, and love for life. Then how can it ever be sour?



But it's not always mushy, sugar-and-spice and everything-nice. There is a point in time when you have to stop looking at your r'ship with rose-tinted glasses. Not always will you be on cloud nine or feel surrounded by fresh roses. Circumstances / situations come in our lives that the regard, love, kindness, respect and warmth just abruptly ends. The feelings turn sour.



But yet, we all behave in love the way people before us have and people after us would continue to do so. We lose sleep, appetite, money and comfort. We sail across seas, climb the highest mountains, promise the moon, dream the most wonderful of dreams, kick traditions, make changes that we normally wouldn't, adjust/compromise.



But we all still want to fall in love. Even if it has nuthing to offer us except bitter regret and pain. We keep looking for more. Don't we?



Well, fools fall in love in a hurry

Fools give their hearts much too soon

Just pay them two bars of stardust

Just hang out one silly moon

Oh-oh! They've got their love torches burning

When they should be playing it cool

I used to laugh but now I understand

Shake the hand of a brand new fool

--THE DRIFTERS

Crossroads.

How good is rebuilding old ties that were, at one point in time, deliberately broken? After all, if they were deliberately broken, surely there was a reason behind breaking them. Then why does a time come in life when you think of revoking the very same decision?



All of us act in a manner which would do nuthing but good to us. We never venture into areas that would do us harm or would be bad to us. Though there are times when we see sense and reality in different ways.



They say wisdom comes with Time. I can't really ascertain this statement, 'cause not enuf time has passed by in my life to make any statements like these. But I know, there are certain things that change with time and it is at these times that certain decisions need to be made. And also adhered too.



There are paths we cross, while crossing we realize that there would be no return journey. There would be no looking back. We transcend from our present into the future. The past, then holds nuthing but memories of the times gone by. Memories that will either bring a smile on your face or a tear in the eye. But they would still be an integral part of your life. We all go thru this at some point in our lives, where we decide to burn certain bridges only to move on. To discover what lies ahead of us (good or bad). A path that beckons us.



I too have my quota of regrets. I have had losses that hurt, choices that I would want to forget and thoughts that have been disarray. There was a point in time when the life had given me a very clear message that to stay would be to be caught up in a web that I was better out of. At times it gets difficult to face what you leave behind. It tears you apart. But why do we do it? Why tear our own self apart when we are unsure of whether the path we tread on would yeild anything good for us? We all face similar situations like these in our lives, in varying degrees.



I again see crossroads. And there is a path I have choosen. I don't know the journey. From where I stand today, things have changed. I don't regret anything of it. But I would certainly change some of the decisions I made, if I were given a chance. But would my changing one decision affect the others?



Donno....

Closed Doors...

Would life be easier if we closed one door and open another one? I wish upon Hail Mary that we shud have some magical keys that would just lock up our past to open it's doors for the future.

She can feel a sense of closure, for the first time in her life. This time the words were clear, unequivocal and the tone imploring. It's about time to put the past behind and time to get on with life. In many ways she had succeeded in overcoming the initial outrage and bitterness she felt over all that happened between them. But even after so many months, some nights she still woke up and lay sleepless for hours, not angry but infinetly sad, remembering that they were happy - genuinely happy for the time they knew each other. A story she tried to not let herself think of anymore. But when she touched that place in her heart where he still lived, the pain of it all still took her breath away.

His actions, words, statements, all of it made the closing easier. She had been liked. That's all she wanted to hear.. Now, she stands in front of her past with its heavy doors inching towards total closure. She feels peace with the decisions she has made, she has learned to live with the mistakes and imperfections. She has also decided to open those "Closed Doors" that she had closed for the last so many years. Things are changing. She deserves every bit of it. She deserves kindness, respect, regard, respect, warmth and a lifetime of love ahead.....

She is ME.

Paisa O' Paisa.

If you were given to choose between an extremely stingy (a person who spends tooo little) and an extremely generous person (a person who whole-heartedly spends), whom would you choose? Considering both the people involved earn equally and are well off.



I would go for the generous person over the stingy one. 'Cause I've realized that people who are stingy with their money are stingy with their emotions and feelings as well. For people like them - every little pleasure they can give to their loved ones or received from them is weighed on the money scale. I relate with people who'd blow their every penny for their loved ones..just to make them happy. For some this might not be practical, but I am sure u'd agree that a gesture like that would say something about the person and make you feel loved and special.



How would you react when you gift a dear friend, and all you get to hear, "I'd take the gift only if you were to take the money from me"!! Can there be anything more insulting?



I have only one thing to say to people like these:



No matter how hard you hug your money, it never hugs back.

~ H. Jackson Brown, Jr

Met A yesterday. After months. We've known each other for coupla months now. Known each other long enuf to take ceah other for granted, make promises and break them, knowing that the other person might understand sooner or later.

We deal with each other's mood swings, multiple moods with ease, an ease that we have perfected over the period of time we've known each other for. It's taken months of mis-understandings, of promising each other to neva tolerate each other's non-sense anymore, and then breaking the oath. It's taken months of fighting over our magnified differences, and then them being reduced. But they still continue to persists. We still argue over silliest of things and fight over whose right and whose wrong. It's taken months of being around each other when needed, of ignoring each other over IM's during a fight and eventually making up. It's taken months of saying the wrong things, and then pacifying each other, of realizing that saying "sorry" makes a difference and some more to realize that it's "feeling" sorry that matters most.

We have no common tragedy or suffering that makes us relate. We have no uncanny connection of the mind. We've also never had any of the chicken soup variety of life's experiences. We are normal people with a very normal friendship. Friendship, according to me, is not about having similarities, it's about the abilitiy of adjusting to highs and lows, accepting each other's indifferent and imperfect personalities.

Our friendship has not ended(hoping that it neva ends), but if it does (due to some alien invasion), I'll remain glad, with the cherished memories, of a friend like you.

Arjun would be leaving on the 17th. And wouldn't come back for a year.

He:

* Makes jerky, arm movements.
* Brings hands to face.
* Has strong reflex movements.
* Turns towards familiar sounds or voices
* Blinks at bright light.
* Repeats vowel noises, such as "ah" or "ooh"
* Smiles.
* Tracks objects with his eyes.
* Raises head and chest when put on tummy.
* Kicks and straightens legs when on back.
* Pushes himself down with legs when placed on a hard surface.
* Reaches for dangling objects, grasps and shakes hand toys.
* Recognizes familiar objects and people, even at a distance.
* Kicks legs energetically.
* Sits without support .
* Can follow a moving object for a 180-degree arc.
* Babbles and amuses self with new noises.
* Explores objects with his mouth.
* Communicates pain, fear, loneliness and discomfort through crying.
* Began his teething process.
* Keeps head level when pulled to sitting position.
* Opens mouth for spoon.
* Chews on objects.
* Gets on arms and knees in crawling position.
* Responds to own name.
* Admires himself in a mirror's reflection.
* Stands holding onto someone.
* Sleeps in my arms while I sing a "Twinkle Twinkle little star" to him.

Arjun sweetheart, u'd be missed a damn lot. Missed for the way:

~you whimper in your crib, to let us know that you've woken up in the morning.

~you take to the water like a duck; was wild, flailing about and splashing during your shower.

~you get cajoled into a new activity.

~you lift your hands for me when I leave the room.

He's my dahling. Incredibly well-behaved, adaptable, easy to handle, easy to predict and delicate.

How I wish I cud tell you what you mean to me and how much I love you.

Please don't ever forget me.

Was just thinking...

*If the crocodile drank all the water...where would the fishes live? There would be no place for those "machlis" 'cause those crocodiles drank all the water.



*If the Department Head's name was Dick...wud he be then called Dickhead?



*Why doesn't a walkman ever walk and a discman doesn't disco?



*Porcupines have such sharp needles. And so do Doctors. Are Porcupines supposed to be the Doctors of the animal world?



Did this post make any sense? Not to me atleast.



Khair...njoi the weekend.

An old saying : Wrapping is a thousand times easier than draping.

To celebrate the festive spirit of Diwali, we come to office dressed in our traditional best. Wow. Great, absolutely wonderful.

So, I get up early in the morning, manage to leave on time wearing the quintessential saree.

The saree has a life of its own. It changes shape, bunches together and opens out to display its embroidered pallu like a show off. At one time it sticks on to me like a lover and the very next minute it loosens itself and has moved. Such behaviour should not be pardoned and should be punishable.

Saari Duniya ek taraf, Niks ki saree ek taraf.

Hail the safety pin(s) that saved my day.


On a different note:

Wishing all you guys a VERY HAPPY DIWALI AND A PROSPEROUS NEW YEAR.



~May Ganesha shower u with His choicest blessings today and forever.

~May this festival of lights bring tons of joy, happiness, prosperity, luck & warmth in your lives.
~May success be yours and time favours you.
~May opportunities knock your door whole year throughout and you make best use of that.
~May you get all the inner strength to fight the odds, year across.
~May all the happy moments be here to cherish forever.

Shubh Deepavali ..... light the lamps of love & affection.

I pray..

Dear God,



Please can food be calorie free? So that I can eat all that I want, how much ever I want and yet not put on an inch.



And speaking of holidays, festivals and bank holidays should NOT be allowed to fall on weekends.



Can I have co-operation from you and the stars on these please!



Thank You.

Knock! Knock...Can I come in?

It's 6:30 AM. My phone rings. I'm woken up with a call from S. And I'm really not a morning person; unless you count 11:59 A.M as morning..tht's when my chakras and grey cells come to life.



Arrgghhh!! So I was saying, it's 6:30 AM and have S on the line. I was in the middle of an early morning dream of Brad Pitt. He's covered in soap; washing his car..oohhhhhh



Anyways, "Hello", I say. "You sound so sexy in the morning, nuts. I am sure you'd look sexy too. I smiled. S, my 6 o' clock friend, my punching bag, my complaint box, a very very good pal and also my shrink. The one person whose always walked besides me, shared my agony and exhilaration.



S: "You answer the following question and you win urself a wonderful breakfast with the only man in your life. How does a man show he is planning for the future"?



Me: It's an old one, S. He buys 2 cans of beer.



S: Perfecto!



Me: Where will the divine union be?



S: Barrista. With me, ur fav. coffee and choco brownie. See you at 9:00.



9:00 AM



It was a beautiful October morning and the cafe was buzzing with people. I and S are seated at the farthest end.



Me: Wot's all this about?



S: I've got an offer from XYZ. I am going to be an RJ!



Me: Wow! Tht deserves a hug. Congratulations



S: Thanks.



S: Nuts, behind every successful man is a woman. Is it 'cause wimmen go for only successful men??? *laughs*



Me: Huh! Was tht a joke? It wasn't funny. How I hate you when you laugh like that.



S: I just wanted to cheer you up.



Me: I smiled.



S: OK, listen to this one. You know why does it take 1 million sperms to fertilize a single egg? Because they don’t stop and ask for directions.



Me: He!He!



My laughter made him smile. He was happy. I guess this is how it is when you really like somone. When someone is close and dear to you. I, for sure, know that he is too precious to me just as I am to him. In this world of "instants" we had an "instant" bonding. He was my laughter machine. What will I do if he went away? He had become a habit.



Me: S, why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, loving and caring?



S: 'Cause they already have boy-friends. :-|



S: You know what nuts, the best thing about you besides being pretty is that you are a wonderful person. I haven't met anyone as wild as you in my life.



Me: *blushing*



S: Have you not heard, “Before you find your handsome prince, You've got to kiss a lot of frogs.”



Me: Yeah, right.



Me: You sure have an attitude problem.



S: Mizz, you have a perception problem.



S: Sometimes I feel, how come we've never fallen in love and thought of getting married.



Me: *Bewildered look* . Silence. What is it that he meant to say?



S: You made me fall in love with you.



Me: S



S: I know my name.



Me: It's not possible.



S: Y, nuts. We've been friends for years now. I always stopped myself 'cause you liked someone else. But today u've let him go. So..knock...knock! Can I come in??



Me: S..u r a great friend. And always shall be.



S: I love you nuts, have always and will always.



Me: It's 11:00. Time to go.



S: Yep. We meet tommorrow again. Does nething change b/w us after me having said this?



Me: Nopes. You are my sweetheart and shall always remain.



Ok. Bye.

Ouch.......it hurts.

You, thought it all.
You, said it all.
I, FELT it all.

You mattered to me. I've known you for quite some time...funny how your statements still hurt so bad?.

There are very few people who make their way into my world. I am absolutely cautious. And, contradictorily, too trusting. I love, care, prod, analyze, understand these people and put them into neat packages. These are the people whom I know I can pick over coffee anytime, have hour long conversations; a r'ship that is to be sensed, a r'ship so deep that there are more feelings that words. People with whom I have a "connection" with. The few that I accept as "friends" (read as family). They are never subjected to scrutiny. People whom I love so much that I would go any lengths to do anything for them. I allow them to take me for granted.

I would lie if I say I dn't expect anything from them. I do. I expect love. Not in the same way that I do, neither the same intensity, but in their own way that they can. I do feel shattered when I don't see it coming.

And one day, something happens and I harden myself and cut those very people from my life.

Wht is it that the people who matter so much inevitably say something that makes your heart ache like it'll never stop or never heal? Why is it that the r'ships that I feel so intensely about..burn theselves out? Why does the "balanced" r'ship not feel worth the while? Do I love too much and yet too less?

Of life-partners and the "process" of discovering them.

P.S: The post is quite loooong. Read it at ur own risk. Didn't say I didn't warn you enuf

It's been six months now since I know A. It's been a pleasure knowing him. A self-confessed adrenaline junkie! Personification of a typical Capricorn. Independent, confident, strong willed, hardworking, unemotional, shrewd, practical, responsible and persevering.

His mood swings; he becomes surprisingly and suddenly witty and subtle for the quiet, might seem reserved to some, and has a tendency to ruin things by unexpected and utterly irresponsible bouts of behaviour. He can make you laugh through twenty different ways, multiplied by twenty one to make you cry and deals with six different people in five different ways!! Goofs up big time and fills his routine quota of regrets.

And he is also Single. Not actually. He's dating V. V and A have been good pals since almost 2 yrs now, ever since A's university days. Dating V, according to A, is a process whereby which he can ascertain whether she is eligible to be his life partner. They "seem" to know each other well; spend hours on the phone talking about everything under the sun, but aren't sure whether they are made for each other.

When we talk of a life partner, we usually think of that one "special" individual that we fall in love with and would life happily ever after. A person who touches your life. A person who shows you to yourself.

Close relationships, according to me, either can start or evolve into, a partnership. A relationship offers a constant reminder of the work that both the people involved have to do. It's the people involved who can transform an ordinary relationship into a precious gift of life time partnership. It's all in our hands. Relationships according to me is an act of playfulness. It's all about intimate sharing, where parts of our shadows are also exposed, sometimes, to test each other's degree of acceptance. A sense of belonging - a face of love.

Coming back to A. He might also live-in (move-in) with V. They are trying to work "this" aspect of their relationship out, to get to know each other "BETTER". He says the intention behind this kinda set-up is to NOT satisfy his physical needs, but to assay whether they are meant for each other or No! It's like, "Try before you buy", "Rent-a-partner", or like, "Buy today, Use it and return tommorrow. Sorry, there would be no refund policy upon return"! Agreed that a live-in relationship is about two people living together out of mutual consent with no legitimate bond whatsoever. No wedding, no security, no alimony. A says, "Niks, what's the big deal about living in"?? Feel like SCREAMING out loud and telling him, "Lack of commitment". A relationship where a person is free to walk out of it as and when he/she pleases. No one is questionable to the other. Darn, it sounds so peachy to ME!! According to me, it's a relationship with "all" the the fringe benefits of matrimony and no legal attachments. The thought just disgusts ME!

I understand that it's important to know your partner before you get married, and even if they do, it doesn't mean they ARE going to live happily with each other. Is a LIVE-IN relationship the "ONLY" way to get to know your partner before you tie the knot? Can a LIVE-IN relationship be a substitute to marriage?

Marriage is about hard-work, patience and compromise. It is NOT about finding the right partner but about learning to live happily with whomsoever you have been paired up with.

Reminds me of Shakespeare's sonnet 116,
SONNET 116
Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

What say you??

Too True, Too Often

Too often we don't realize

What we have until it is gone

Too often we wait too late to say

"I'm sorry - I was wrong."



Sometimes it seems we hurt the ones

We hold dearest to our hearts

And we allow foolish things

To tear our lives apart.



Far too many times we let

Unimportant things into our minds

And then it's usually too late

To see what made us blind.



So be sure that you let people know

How much they mean to you

Take that time to say the words

Before your time is through.



Be sure that you appreciate

Everything you've got

And be thankful for the little things

in life that mean a lot.



--Thnkx Amit.H for sending this to me.

How I wish we could stop certain ppl from coming into our lives. Especially if they were destined to leave. But we do have choices, don't we? Yeah, but sometimes we don't. You are put in a situation wherein you are asked to choose between the devil and a road full of cactus to tread on. You are going to get hurt either ways.

You seeped through and through to my bones and from thereon to my soul. I know...it was tooo soon...

Someday this heartahe will go. There will be no pain. My heart will grow cold after a while. It will be alright.

Until then, you remain....as a distant memory...so all who know me and see me..will know that you have been with me...ONE TIME...some time.....

Was alone at home in the afternoon. Sometimes you require time..to think for yourself. I wonder what is it about we humans that we always venture into situations which are dangerous; into situations that are doomed with failure?



Is there anything such as will and free-choice in this thing called " LIFE". Is life a chagrin for everyone? Is life predertimed for us in each step; with one choice leading to a consice conclusion? Are we our own enemies?



'A' says I have always been judgemental. Mebbe. There are certain things that I would NEVA do, because "I" feel it is wrong. Is it wrong to lay your own rules and live by them? There are certain things about me that 'A' denounces. He deprecates most of my princilpes. Wot the heck? Y is it so important that rules made by me should be in consensus with him? I am not asking him to live his life on rules made by me.!!!



I wonder was life always like that or I have just smelled reality, or is it that just in recent times the world has become a shaky place to live. You confront the situations that you always wanted to avoid, the people whom you love the most would just walk past (read as over) you, your best buddy will stab you from behind. And then when you introspect deep within, u'd realize that there is a dark side inside you too. Your cryptic twin..the devil you always condemned.



Even when your head tells you something, your heart, the most trusted organ, whom you trust upon to lead you through , will be a traitor. The heart..it welcomes an unknown vistor, who speaks lies with such diligence, disembarks your life, and challenges you to deny your true feelings.



What is the best thing to do? How does one learn when there are no guidelines? When all the advice you receive and all the Literature tells you to listen to your heart, but your HEAD, the practical one...would not allow you to take the necessary steps and allow you to rest in peace. When life hangs suspended, actions comes to a halt and you are on guard constantly. I have been spending so much of time these days on the fringes of sanity and the best part is it is not funny anymore.



I am tired of finding explanations and rational interpretations. I wish I knew, like so many other things, but right now I am backtracking. I am way too lost in fighting my own self. I am my own worst enemy.

Happy Dussehra

May God bless you with happiness all the year through.

Beyond you...

No matter how smart you are but you can stil make mistakes.
No matter how fast you are someone slower may still be able to beat you.
No matter how strong you are but your vulnerability can throw you on the mat.

Everything that seems right can go wrong and ther are times when you get away with just bout everything you do.

Life is short, sometimes unfair..but yet a long-long journey....

It is all about choices..the onces we make.

God speaks "Anything is possible". Go closer. And the stmnt ends at "Conditions Apply".

Life is a journey..no one knows the destination. We are all travellers till the end of time.

What is life? A game, an imprisonment or a mad-house?

What lies beyond feelings, lonliness, company, love and its permutations and combinations?

Do you know what lies beyond nothingness?

What are you searching for??

Beyond you.. lies what?

Here's me gng down memory lane..once again...

--->I recall those days spent on the terrace, under the buliding water tank, on those pipes. That place was our headquarters; we would do hours and hours of plotting and planning of how we'd spend our holidays.

--->I recount those days when all the children from the society would gather in the building compound to play. We played and played and played some more. The highlight of our lives was the game of chor-police and ghar-ghar.

--->I remember birthdays. They were the most awaited days. Distributing chocolates to the whole class and all the teachers, wearing new clothes and feeling proude of being a year older.

--->I remember the times we fought..like there was no tommorrow. But we were back togther as thick pals the next day. There were no grays in our lives; either you love someone or you don't. It was all black and white.

--->I remember exam time..unit tests were most hated and semesters more so. Learning pages of information to spill it all over the answer sheets. Feeling happy on the last day of exams, welcoming the summer vacations, treating ourselves to ice-creams and playing away in the evening.

--->I remember the monsoon. Wading thru mud pools in gum boots and rain coats. Monsoon was meant to get wet...change and get wet again.

--->I remember my fav. teacher..Mr.Ganatra. He left school for a better venture. We all had given him a souvenir. Wonder whether he still has it.

--->I remember the days when luch time was spent running between classrooms and Tiffin box was eaten during breaks or on our way home (to avoid shoutings from mom). Free periods were a God-sent and remarks in the calender meant signature from the parent.

--->I remember the time when punishment was standing on the classroom bench or kneeling down outside the class. Library meant Enid Blyton's, Nancy Drews and Hardy Boys.

--->I remember school picnics. A trip to Aarry Milk colony and Chota Kashmir. Camping was at Mahableshwar.

--->I remember Sports Day. Winning was an extra point in the "Blue House" kitty. Annual Day....the day of showcasing one's talent.

I remember my childhood. I hope today's childern have just as many memories of their childhood. I wish their memories are not virtual and are more real.

Satte pe Satta.

Seven Things I want to do before I die:

1. Adopt
2. Live
3. Discover the elixir of life ;))
4. Go on a World Tour.
5. Own a villa in Tuscany (Italian food, Italian Men, Olives...can anyone as for more!)
6. Sponsor a child's (or children's, depending on how much money I have) education.
7. Build a school for underprivileged kids.

Seven Things I can do :

1. Listen patiently
2. Adhere to a diet..strictly.
3. Smile
4. Cry
5. Worry
6. Write
7. Blog

Seven Things I say most :

1. Gosh!
2. Jeez
3. Whtz up?
4. Oh! God!
5. Get Lost
6. Go to hell
7. I’ll kill you!!

Seven Things I can't do :

1. Tolerate cigarette smoke.
2. Paint.
3. Stop Shopping.
4. Make small conversations.
5. Stand the smell of fish.
6. Get up early in the morning.(unless you consider 11:59 AM as morning!)
7. Write humourous stuff.

Seven Things that attract me to the opposite sex :

1. Voice (well modulated and sexy)
2. Passion
3. Simplicity
4. Sensibility
5. Good boy..with that mischevious bad boy look ;-)
6. Eyes
7. Ability to strike a conversation.

Seven Celebrity crushes (It's so difficult to stick to 7) :

1. Brad Pitt. (ooohhhh + ooomph)
2. Rahul Dravid.
3. Abhishek Bacchan
4. Pete Sampras
5. John Abraham
6. Tom Hanks
7. Denzel Washington

Seven People I want to tag:

1. Z000nie
2. Keshi
3. Sunny Boy
4. Gops
5. SA - He doesn't blog. Only posts comments.
6. Amit.H - He doesn't blog. Only posts comments.
7.Mitesh

:.I also want to tag other Non-Bloggers:.

1. Vijz
2. Sheetal
3. Richa
4. Suraj
5. Rahul
6. Sana
7. Vibha

Happiness with 0% calories.

The discussion was "Merits / De-Merits of Dieting and Exercise. Bhaiya said, "Niks you are a chottu who's turned Mottu". I gaped. Food choked. Culdn't eat. Grrrr...my brother.

My own flesh and blood said that...Khoon ke rishtey...

So then I promised myself that I'd stop eating outside, would not go to _Mocha / Barrista / CCD or any other place that serves ma fav. choco / banana - walnut brownie!

But then, Tomm is Sushant's Appy Budday and then it's Rahul's and Sana's and so many more B'days cming up. And there is a wedding I gotto attend...how do I let go of such events?

To prove my brother wrong and to ascertain that I am not a "MOTU", I removed my sooper purana jeans and tried them. These jeans are my acid test. I wear them to check on my stats everytime I feel guilty 'bout missing the Gym. Tday morning when I tried them..I fit into them. I haven't put on an inch!! Yeh!Yeh! Dhin...tara...dhin tara....

No fat needs to be burnt now..Bhaiya was wrong. Sms'd him. And I am soooooo happy....

I hate working on Saturdays. You can call me lazy, lethargic and sluggish. I am a vagabond at heart.

By vagabond I don't aim to be a hermit or a reculse. I want to be free...I don't want to be bound by rules, I don't want to be chained. I want to live each day in awe. So much happens each day and I just want to experience as much as I can. I want to be a person who lives and let lives. I want to be close to nature and in turn be close to the Creator. I want to go round the world, across mountains, across seas, through desert and snow. I want to go for long drives to nowhere in particular; Step off the trail and letting yourself get lost at a park. I want to meet people, talk to them, shake hands with them, learn about their culture..about them.

I want to share the knowledge that I have and gaining what I dont. I want to be a bird in the sky, an animal in the forest, a fish in the ocean and a human on earth. I want to run to where I want to, dance to the tunes of the raindrops, hear my voice echo on the cliff of a mountain; visit every shrine in the world and admire the beauty.

I want to see people smiling, I want to hear laughter....I want so many things, but most of all I want to be at liberty; to do what I want to do, to feel what I want to, to think, to dream....

I want Saturdays to be a holiday. Period.

Am I asking for too much?

Was chatting with Vijz last nite for 4 hrs continous. Apart from the fact that we are best of pals, what brings us to a common cubicle is our insane sense of humour which we both possess. We make a laughter riot of the saddest of jokes and even njoi them immensely.

Was telling her how Arjun loves to hear nursery rhymes while he's put to sleep and thereafter we created our own version of nursery rhymes. We screwed the originals and laughed on their maligned versions.

Here's how it started:

Nikita says: Arjun loves hearing "Mary had a little lamb wala poem"

Vijz says: You actually sing the entire poem to him? Just tell him in short na, "Mary had a little lamb...and it was delicious after it was cooked"!!!

Nikita says: Yeah, right!

Vijz says: Ok, here's my version of "Twinkle Twinkle"

Nikita says: Go on.

Vijz says: Twinkle Twinkle little star,
Powdered Pencil, Cold Cream Jar,
Powder Puff and Lipstick too,
Will make a beauty out of YOU!

Nikita says: I dn't need the above things to make a beauty out of me :P


Vijz says: Fcuk off!

Vijz says: Another one.

Vijz says: On Mary and her little lamb....oops skirt.

Nikita says: skirt????

Vijz says: My / Our version, remember?

Nikita says: ok.

Vijz says: Mary had a little skirt,

Nikita says: Little???with splits on the side

Vijz says: He!he!he! You and your "wild" imaginations!!

Nikita says: :D

Vijz says: Everytime Mary walked,

Nikita says: Guys would see her thighs!

Vijz says: Wah!Wah!

Vijz says: So, complete it

Nikita says: Mary had a little (short) skirt,
with splits on the side,
Everytime Mary walked,
Guys would see her thighs!

Nikita says: Poor Mary! She's gone thru so many adaptions by us.

Vijz says: He!he!he!

Nikita says: Ok, bye now

Vijz says: Ok Bye. cheee you. G'nite. Sweety-piez.


Vijz, my life would have been so colourless with you.

Another rainy day....

Eerie clouds, heavy rains, oh and an alien hue. Another fine day in Mumbai.

And, I am lovin' it! :-)

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaatttttttchhhhhhhooooooooo. Xcuse Moi.



I've caught a fever and her maids-in-waiting, headache, et al. It'll give me a lot of time to myself though..sometimes, one needs that kinda time...even if u're sick, if it gets u away from all and leaves u in the company of urself, sometimes...sometimes its' good.

whatsayu?!



Khair.



You guys have a nice weekend.

May you be blessed with prosperity and happiness.



Happy Ganesh Chaturthi to all!



~Cheerio!

And hence it all came at an end. Shorter questions and even more shorter answers. A Final BYE is where it gradually came to a close. That one conversation drifted them miles apart from each other. It was quite peaceful, no struggle, no assaults on the senses, the mind was free..only the heart would take longer.

Hate it when I have no one else to blame but myself.

Am i supposed to feel better or worse when you tell me, 'a lot of other people have gone through this, you will come out of it ok'?

Dealing with the Ideal.

This is the outcome of the endless time spent at the college canteen.

All researchers all over the world and also the makers of Viagra have concluded that women are a lot more complicated than men. Was talking to Rahul on why love, sex, marriage, passion mean different things to Men and Women, and he pops the question, “What women want”?

Donno about the other wimmen, but for me my willingness to love someone depends on numerous inconsistent factors, unlike men, for whom arousal always leads to desire.! I am just as mystifying, bewitching and bewildering, like every other woman, to men. Unlike men who want to get to the destination quick ;-), but I checker the highway to love and passion with many directions, potholes, speed-breakers and check-posts!

I am not into fast food. To me, dating is a delicate process: it’s a test of compatibility, a connection of souls, and for the man to come into my life he must be gifted with:

1. Gift of a visual treat. Ok, I’ll aim for a Brad Pitt or a Hugh Grant, might also settle for a lesser mortal. My guy has to be taller than me and his breast size can’t exceed mine. Moustache-free men, to me are SEXY.

2. Gift of passion. I have an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. The hands-off chemistry must electrify my senses. Whether it’s looking deep into my eyes, (stripping me of all my pretenses) while conversing, speaking with a passion for life, work, hobbies, work, even a fellow sexy women colleague/friend or by sporting a masculine perfume or deo, he must attract, attract, ATTRACT!

3. Gift of sincerity and ease. Insincere praise is worse than no praise at all. Even self-praise is a put-off and a complete NO NO. Boastful talk about materialistic possessions and status is just too irritating. I immensely enjoy conversing with men who are comfortable in their own skin, confident and non-threatening.

4. Gift of the gab (Most important). It seems to me that small talk comes in large doses. Mental foreplay is sexy and stimulating, and men who can banter on a variety of topics and issues with clarity, wisdom and intellect enthrall me, assuming they speak good English and devoid of bad breath.!

5. Gift of manners. I judge a man by the way he treats his pets (if of course, he has one or many), children, parents and staff. A man who is amiable despite having gotten served the wrong dish and politely brings it to the notice of the hotel staff gets three cheers!!!

6. Gift of humour. I admire people who have the ability to laugh at themselves, take life head-on with wit and sparkle.

7. Gift of spontaneity. The element of surprise is exhilarating. A walk in the rain, roses, an impromptu decision of a long drive or a short vacation over a long weekend…Sigh!

8. Gifted with no addictions. Kissing a smoker is like kissing an ash-tray. I find smoking and drugs physically offensive.

9. Gift of romance. To be ordinary is not a choice. Blame it on my teenage Mills and Boon fetish but romantic, chivalrous men score major brownie points. A man, who is able through simple gestures to make me feel I’m not just one person in this world but am the world to him, magnetizes me.

10. Gift of sensitivity. All people, things who are integral part of my life should be accepted. Not necessarily appreciated. Acceptance should be unconditional.

In short, crossing the BIG line adds up to trust, respect, chemistry, comfort, longevity and romance. Is it a very tall order? But then women like me are also very hard to impress.

Ok, It was not a big deal. I confided in him and told him of my worst fears. And I hear him say, "Niks, give your small bheja some rest"!! "You need to chill mate",!!. What the hell??!! Grrrr.... Feel like kicking him on his ass!!!

I should have felt lighter after confiding in him. BUT NO! I am ANGRY at HIM for making fun of me. Some people. *Sigh*

I want to know...How do you feel after confiding in someone (it can be anyone from a close friend to a sibling)? Do you feel light or do you feel..Oh!God..now she/he knows everything? What is your state of mind? Do you feel bad? Do you feel as if you've done a mistake by opening your potpourri?

So long...comments awaited.

Sulky Me...:-(

I am now sulking. S has gone to Bangalore and I so do wanted to go with him. And I am totally irked by the fact that he hasn't called me. He's going to get a punch on his nose when he comes back. Grrrrrr......

I was given a don't-behave-like-a-kid lecture by Vijz. Sheetal's cell is also non-functional since the past 3 days; the ignoble reliance guys have not activate her new number. Now, I am all lost.

To make me feel better (or miserable!) she ordered my fav. chocolate brownie with added measure of chocolate sauce!! Slurrrp! Yum! Yum! Forgot all bout Sushant and Sheetal. Me going to dig in that brownie.(I eat when I am upset :P)

Choorieee Sushant and Sheetal, You shall be remembered a lil' later. No wallowing for some time. No sulking.

I love him so much..

....for the way he made me feel like we were made for each other the first time we met.

...that everything is forgiven and forgotten the time I hear his voice.

....that I wait all day to speak to him, share with him the day's minuest details, no matter how insanely late he is.

....that I overlook his flaws.

....that I see and feel him in my dreams.

....that no matter how far he is from me, I think about him every second of my life.

....that I forgive him for goofing and messing up things.

....that I have forgotten to eat, sleep, drink, socialize, read and concentrate on life.

....that I get thrilled to see him online.

....that despite all odds, at the back of my mind, I still hope of something materializing and that we will be together one day.

....that I fail to notice how he may be using me to his own advantage.

....that I look past the things that don't seem right.

....for all the efforts he makes in getting to know and understand me better.

....the crazy way in which I miss him.





I love him so much that I would give up everything and anything to be with him for the rest of my life, if he asks. The truth is so profound; I know that he wants me in a limited way (Just as friends) and he has assured me that we won't get attached and that he is well armed of such an eventuality.



Why do we love someone so much that they start making a difference to our lives.??? When we knew in the first place that it was never meant to be, why does it hurt even more finally knowing for sure?



I am surprised at how juvenile I am. I am scared of confronting my feelings.



So, Dear You, I wanted to say thanks. For nothing. For everything. I am slotting us into nicely fitted frames because neither friend nor boyfriend suffices? And why the hell must it?



Mom/Dad, get the arranged marriage thingie going. 'Cause I have given up.

I, Me, Myself...

I AM : Irrelevantly Illogical by nature, too unpredictable and
belligerent.
I WANT : True Love.
I HAVE : Lived through the various colors life has shown me.
I WISH: Upon a star .
I HATE: Liars, Flakes, Fakes, and Bigots not to mention Zealots.
I FEAR : Being alone.
I WONDER: What's gonna happen next?
I REGRET: Not finding the courage to look into his eyes and say, I MISS
YOU.
I LOVE: My father,my mother, Arjun, my bhai and my sister-in-law in
that order.
I AM NOT: A morning person.
I CRY: When I see movies that have sad endings. They create a lump in my throat.
I WRITE: Lotsa senti stuff.
I CONFUSE: Myself and all others associated with me.

About thyself:

1.Single or taken : Single
2.Your age : It's a cardinal sin to ask a woman her age, idiot.
3.Sign: Gemini
4.Siblings: 1 bada bhaiya.
5.Hair Colour: Black
6.Eye Colour: Black
7.Shoe size: 5
8.Time you work up today: 6:30 AM
9.Place of birth: Mumbai, India
10.Which car do you drive: a Black Accent.

My Favourite:

1.Number: 3
2.Colour: Black (It makes me look thin :o))
3.Day: Friday
4.Month(s): May, June and December
5.Bands: Christina Aguilera, Enrique Iglesias, Jagjit Singh, Pankaj Udhas, Backstreet Boys, Britney Spears.
6.Food: Chinese,Italian,Mexican
7.Season:Monsoon
8.Sport:Cricket

Relationships:

1.My best friend(s) are: Sushant, Anita, Sonu, Sheetal, Vijz, Dee, Amit.H, Rahul.
2.You into a relationship? NO.

Stuff:

1.You shop at: Benetton, Lifestyle, Mango, Marks and Spencer and Gap.
2.Do you have any piercings: Not Yet.
3.Do you do Drugs: NO
4.You Smoke: No
5.You Drink:Occassionally
6.The last person you called:Vijz.
7.How many buddies do you have online right now: 7 on Msn and 12 on Y!

Have You Ever:

1.Given anyone a bath: Yes, my nephew Arjun.
2.Smoked: No
3.Bungee Jumped: No
4.Made yourself throw up: Yes
5.Been in Love: Yes (I still am in love with HIM!)
6.Lied to get out of trouble: Yes, I lie to save my ass, sometimes.
7.Cried when someone died: Yes. The day my grandma passed away.
8Fallen for any of your buddies: Yes. HIM!
9.Rejected someone: Yes
10.Done something you regret: Yes. (Can't write about that here)

Current:

1.Clothes: Low-waist Levis jeans, a light pink T-shirt from Mango (picked from UK).
2.Hair: wet and left open
3.Book: The Monk who sold his Ferrari
4.In the CD Player: Britney Spears
5.In the DVD Player: My best friend's wedding.


Last Person:

1.You gave a Hug: My nephew Arjun, 1/2 hr ago.
2.You spoke to: Sheetal (10 mins ago)
3.You chatted with: Amit M.


Random:

1.In the morning I am: grouchy and utterly irritable. I hate mornings.
2.All I need is: a person to love senslessly and to be loved back in return.
3.I dream: Of being held in a way and rest there forever smug and comfortable in all the warmth.


Do you:

1.Sit on the internet all night waiting for that someone special to come on: Yes, not all night tho'.
2.Wish you were a member of the opposite sex: No ways. I am proud to be a woman.
3.Wish you were younger: My mental age hasn't increased at all.!!
4.Cried because someone said something to you. Yes, the last time was when Amit.M exploded on me for NO reason at all (While I was in UK)!(I hope you are reading this. Would you still care to xplain what went wrong??)


Number Game:

1.No. of times got my heart broken: 1.
2.No.of hearts I have broken: Donno.
3.No.of tight friends: 5
4.No.of Cd's I own: Too many.


~Ok Bye haan. Cheeya. Have a nice week.

Tongue Tied.

Expressing yourself clearly and effectively is a gift. A gift that I am not blessed with.

Everytime I want to express my deepest emotions I have always fallen smack on my face. There are people to whom my continous ramblings, rants and raves are a constant source of entertainment. Yes people, I am an eccentirc and a sprightly spirited character. The joke is not on me and I didn't plan it that way.


I have always introspected time and again on the way I speak. There have been times when I have been affable and outgoing in my conversations, which resuts in S thinking that I am stringing him along all the time.

Diplomacy is also not my cuppa chai. I can call a moron a moron, a house a house and a spade a spade. Today I happened to give a genuine compliment (or comment, whatever it is!) to a fellow woman colleague. She asked me, "Niks, how do i look in this black dress?" "Don't I look in shape?" and I answered, "Yes, ofcourse U look in proper shape. Round also is a shape!!. She goes away with a grunt, swears on me and promises herself to never ask me anything again.

We women surely are complex creatures. (I'm sure this would put a smile on the faces of all the MEN reading this). We can't be deciphered. But Men are equally bad. I give up on all humans.

~Cheerio.

On a different note, one day I am going to look in his eyes and tell him what he means to me. Amen!

A stapler pin attacked me tday..a khooni one...

Vijz came to office tday. She had just returned from a short trip to Pune and came to show me the pics.

The stapler pin made its move just as we sat on the couch (Don't let ur imaginations run wild here!) at the reception. Caught the victim (ME) unaware and it stuck to my finger. Vijz plucked it out and threw it in the bin, quoting, "Ek stapler pin ko maarne so kya hoga, haazar aur paida ho jayenge" :D

Decided to destroy the root..ME gng to buy a stapler.

Looking back....

I saw then through a range of emotions....
sometimes seeped in brittle joy, often full of life......
With questions in my mind and answers in my hearts...
With reminiscences of yesterday and hope for tommorrow....

I can see you sitting across the computer, running your hand through your hair, your glasses reflecting the glare of the monitor and today, I feel nothing - you have finally been banished to memory.

I hope that you are at peace with yourself and happy at your heart.

To all brothers....

Couriered rakhi to bhai tday...it's Raksha Bandhan on the 19th. It would reach him by then. I had promised myself that I'd not moon over my brother not being here. It's been 10 years since he's away and every year during this time I feel miserable.

He's been my pillar of strength and support system......always let me have the bigger helping of dessert, helped me complete my project the night before it's due (even tho' he knew I'd take the credit for a job well done!), knew when I've been good and bad (more than Santa Claus ever will) and always made me feel like a younger sister (in his own twisted and weird way). :-).

Everyone should have a sibling.....I am against the one child policy. Who would a single child fight with? argue with? Irritate? sneer at? tease?

I pray that everybody's brother is safe and fine. Happy Raksha Bandhan to all brothers. May you always find joy in life.

Another fwd:

Atypical Vijz sent fwd:

1. Don't imagine you can change a man unless he's in diapers.
2. What do you do if your boyfriend walks-out? You shut the door.
3. If they put one man on the moon -- they should be able to put them all up there.
4. Go for younger men. You might as well, they never mature anyway.
5. Men are all the same -- they just have different faces, so that you can tell them apart.
6. Definition of a bachelor; a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.
7. Best way to get a man to do something, is to suggest they are too old for it.
8. Women don't make fools of men -- most of them are the do-it-yourself types.
9. Remember a sense of humor does not mean that you tell him jokes, it means that you laugh at him.
10. Never let your man's mind wander - it's too little to be out alone
11. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener...
12. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years... Even in Biblical times, men wouldnt ask for directions....
13. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him - Cheque Books....
14. Sadly, all men are created equal.....

Men, no offense! It's just a laugh.....

I realize that you mean the world to me....Is it too late to confess?

Met A after a looong time tday. Coffee and conversations followed. Then I told him, "Shilpa is getting married". I knew the news disturbed him. He wasn't appeased. "That's news", is all he said. "Is it affecting you"?, I asked him. He didn't utter a word and instead banged his fist on the table.

Shilpa loved A much more than he ever knew. She culd never confess it to him but she gave him all the subtle hints which A did not reciprocate to, for whatever reason.

"She's been a great friend, it's not that I was or am in love with her or something, but the truth remains that I can't see her with somone else" he said. I was confused. "You never fancied her when she was in love with you, you never paid heed to any of her extremely obvious gestures towards you. And now when she's getting married to someone else you are not liking it? Why?", I asked him.

"You jealous? 'cause she's found someone else and you are still trying, Or your male ego is hurt", I continued. "Nopes Niks, it's not about ego here....it's....donno....mebbe", he said.


We all tend to belittle this love thing while we are young. We want to fist fall in love and then think long term. "Sometimes I wonder if I made a mistake by turning Shilpa down. She is intelligent, fairly good looking, extremely loving and was deeply in love with me. Is not better to be with someone who loves rather than waiting for the person you love"?, he asked.

I looked at him and pondered on what he had just said. Is it really better to be with someone who loves us rather than waiting for someone who might love us, and there culd be a possibility of that someone never turning up?

"Forget it, it's too late now", I said. "I am sure you wouldn't want to jeopardise her marriage just 'cause you SUDDENLY have realised what she means to you"!!

We so often are blinded by the attractions around us that we fail to realize the treasures we have. So many of us crib of never having experienced true love, but what about the love we turn down? How can you affirm that the love we trun down is not true love? The person who loves us truly might not be that "special someone" according to us, but the fact that you are that "special somone" for him/her, doesn't that feeling make you feel special? We always realize the importance of someone in our life only after their presence is threatened! We take them for granted, isn't it?

Some times in life the person whom we love doesn't seem to understand our feelings, just like we don't seem to understand the feelings of those who love us....

For me life means......

...........A picture postcard of happiness and treasured memories of nostalgia.

Opportunity knocks many times.

Got this fwd today. Prolly an old one, but significance still holds :)

A young man who wished to marry the farmer's beautiful daughter. He went to the farmer to ask his permission. The farmer looked him over and responded, "Son, go stand out in that field and I'm going to release three bulls, one at a time. If you can catch the tail of any one of the three bulls, you can marry my daughter."

The young man stood in the pasture awaiting the first bull. The barn door opened and out ran the biggest, meanest-looking bull he had ever seen. He decided that one of the next bulls had to be a better choice than this one, so he ran over to the side and let the bull pass through the pasture out the back gate.

The barn door opened again. Unbelievable. He had never seen anything so big and fierce in his life. It stood - pawing the ground, grunting, slinging slobber - as it eyed him. Whatever the next bull was like, it had to be a better choice than this one. He ran to the fence and let the bull pass through the pasture, out the back gate.

The door opened a third time. A smile came across his face. This was the weakest, scrawniest little bull he had ever seen. This one was his bull. As the bull came running by, he positioned himself just right and jumped at just the exact moment. He grabbed... but the bull had no tail!

Life is full of oppourtinities. Some easy to take advantage of and some difficult. Many a times we let them pass in hope(s) of something better, these are the ones that don't come and are never available again.

Smoky weddings.

Attended a family wedding tday. Since Momma's outta town and Dad's unwell, had to go with my aunt. Marriages of tday are so pompous and weird. Imagine sitting in front of a fire (not a nice campfire, mind you), lot of smoke for 3-4 hours and all those ceremonies.....oooh...tough to imagine...thank GOD it needs to be done only once in a lifetime. But the one positive point tho'..marriages leave one happier...glad tht it's finally over and done with. Whew!.... :D



This wedding was like any other. Bored bridegroom, tired bride, plastic smiles, irritating camera man, flashing lights, over dressed matrons, under dressed salads...BUT the food was YUM! Got a few nagging comments from irritating relatives on how little I know of my religion and my religious duties...so what??? Do I go and drown myself in a drum full of dhokla batter......???!! Grrrr.........

F.R.I.E.N.D.S

There are sometimes in life when you feel down, and sad for no reason at all. These are times you miss the people you love and care about. I call this a time for FRIENDS. They just have to hug you once to make you forget all the pain that is there in the world,
to make you love the fact that GOD made friends.

Since it's Friendship week, lemme take this oppourtinity to thank each one of you for always being there. S, Sushant, Sheetal, Dee, Amit.M, Mitesh, Amit.H, Vijz, Vibha, Sabs, Amit.A and Delphine.....all seperate entities, with their own set of morals/ethos/values..from different cultural backgrounds..with different set of priorities, different ambitions/aspirations..yet all fit in like a planned puzzle.

You guys are the love of my life. I have always looked, still look and always will look upon you to soothe my ruffled feathers, solve my problems and gimme moral support. No matter where I go, whatever I do....I shall always draw strength from the fact that I have you all who love me for who I am..and for being ME.

Had read this poem while surfing...


When troubles come your soul to try,
You love the friends who just stand by.
Perhaps there's nothing they can do,
The thing is strictly up to you.

For there are troubles all your own,
And paths the soul must tread alone.
Times when love can't smooth the road,
Nor friendship lift the heavy load.

But just to feel you have friends,
Who will stand by until the end.
Whose sympathy through all endures,
Whose warm handclasp is always yours.

It helps somehow to pull you through,
Although there's nothing they can do.
And so with fervent heart we cry,
God Bless the friends who just stand by.

Momma was aghast and almost got a cardiac arrest when she saw the mess called my cupboard. A what-an-untidy-and-a-messy-gurl-you-are lecture followed :o(. So I took it upon myself to clean up all that mess.

I opened the cupboard, saw the once neat interiors, gave a disgusted shrug, made a discordant sound, promised myself to clean up the mess soon and be a more tidier person in future, closed the door and walked away.

What diligence! As Vijz would put it, "My idea of housework is sweeping the room with a glance"! How well you know me :-).

They say I have been lately analyzing too much. Mebbe yes. I've tried to get rid of it but culdn't. It's too deeply ingrained in my psyche. If you think I can't write funny stuff..then you are RIGHT.....I can't (I am not adept at it). I can make a satire out of people, life and incidents, but humorous writing, which is a charisma, (Some people are so adroit at it..I envy them) is something GOD for his own reasons has deprived me of.



I started blogging because I need to empty my think tank from all those capricious thoughts that agglomerate and agitate me. Blogging alleviates me from them...well atleast for some time.



So all fellow bloggers who spend their esteemed time reading my posts..please bear with me. This is the only way outta my mental gas chamber.

Silent.

I wish I culd put in words wht exactly is on my mind, then I would do so with alacrity. But this is something that I DARE not say loud. Most of the times, I fear...fear of my own words..they might lie. I am also frightened by being swept away, losing all perspective, all logic, all balance. The truth is so earth-shakingly profound. It's a story played out a hundred times. For the first time I am condemned to silence.

Mumbai Mayhem.

Rains paralysed Mumbai, India's financial and entertainment capital, turning it into a virtual sea on Wednesday, trapping thousands in homes and offices, in stationary cars, buses, trains, railway stations and airports.



More than 100 people across Maharashtra lost their lives in the partly natural, partly man-made disaster, as Mumbai underwent a torture unprecedented even by the standards of a city whose streets routinely get flooded every monsoon. Large numbers were trapped or killed in mudslides. Some were reportedly electrocuted while walking through flooded streets where overhead power lines had collapsed.



Ladies and Gentleman - Let us observe a minute's silence for all those people who could not cope with the magnitude of the crisis and have lost their lives.

"I had an abortion." - she said. I watched her innocence vanish as she spoke to me.

Her whispered words cut into my heart and silenced my brave words. V was married for four years now and a mother of a two year old. She terminated her pregnancy because she thought it was too early for a second child.

I saw her heart break and her world shatter as she narrated her suffering caused by abortion. She grieved for the baby she aborted and begged to God for forgiving her for emptying her womb.. She never imagined that she would become an abortion statistic.

Her life became a surreal blur the minute she aborted. Guilt was her shroud. She gave people so many excuses for having an abortion. "It's not the right time," or "we aren't settled into our own lives," or "we could never afford it," or "I have health problems." All of these statements were true, but I knew she was only trying to convince herself that her decision was sound.

She knew pregnancy was a risk when she missed pills. She took the risk. She became pregnant. She chose abortion. Her choices had repercussions. She spent her days reflecting on her existence and herdecision. She questioned everything. She wondered how her life would have been different with one more child. She pondered damnation. She spent her days drowning in tears and idleness followed. She made no excuses and both husband-wife took full responsibility of their actions. She kept hanging on to what-if's, her imagined life kept her in limbo. She wasted precious time wishing she had made a different decision.

I hugged her...told her it would be fine. Told her that she is still worthy of love and worthy of this life.

I knew it was unbearable for her. The hurt. The sadness. The loss.

Pls V...let go. Pick up your feet and move on. Surrender to reality and embrace the present, pack it carefully away with all the other memories and experiences that make a woman. Please gain control. Please continue to live....

At work..listening to "Tumse kahe yah hum na Kahe" from the movie Bride and Prejudice...almost alone in the cubicle...thinking about HIM, missing HIM, arbitary thoughts swirling in the mind, tea is strong.. ..liking it, it's raining outside, monsoon is lovely, 'P' is talking, giving me company..but I am hardly listening to her..mind is somewhere else and so is the heart..someday I am gonna crash against some rocks and sink in unknown shores....peace till then.

Hope you guys had a lovely weekend!