Born under a lucky star.

I, like all others, too have a begining.

The entire world celebrated the day I was born. That day, till today is cherished as that of love, happiness and dreams. Ok, now please stop giving me that "Niks,-don't-blow-your-trumpet" look.

Mum says it was a calm and quite evening compared to the calamity they thought was in store. The earth did not shake, volcanoes did no erupt and neither did the tsunami wipe away lives to mark the fiasco that occurred on that Summer of '80.

To watch the sonograpy of their unborn child gives utmost joy to all expectant parents. My parent's picture perfect view of their innocent baby cuddling in the womb came crashing. And it exacerbated when they were informed that I was topsy-turvey. I am not talking of my twisted brains which look like entagled spaghetti, if you were to do an x-ray; I mean that I was born upside down. I gave momma lotsa complications before birth - and the legacy has continued till date :-).

That's how mum carried me for 9 months - upside down. And, finally on this day I decided to make a grand entry into this world. After being taken out of the womb, all bloody and wrinkled, I posed as a Angelina-Jolie-on the-beach and made sounds that was music to all male doctors. I saw the purest form of love-at-first-sight in my father's eyes, when he took me in his arms for the first time.
That's how my journey started in this world. The 26 years that have followed have been emphasized by events, mostly unexpected, which form the basic essence of my life.

Some people in the world are damn damn lucky. And after having sucha wonderful birthday, I can say I am amonsgt them. Wouldn't had ever imagined that turning 26 would be so satisfying and enjoyable. There are of course certain unfortunate events, and how I hope things had not gone wrong the way they did. There's nuthing I can do to reverse that, but I pray that things get better soon.

How I love birthdays. For all the remembrance, for all the love, care, affection, goodwill, warmth, happiness and GIFTS ;-)! Thanks a million for all those kind words and gestures, awesome cards, wonderful emails - all of which make me feel so precious.

P.S: A special note to 'A' and 'Sheetal' for sending me that pretty basket of flowers. It makes me realize how lucky I am to have you in my life; who makes sure that I get the things I like best on my birthday. Sweets, thanks a MILLION.

See your troubles as blessings.

Our troubles are actually blessings in disguise. Each of you would agree with me that we learn the most from the difficult experiences. Have you ever wondered, why we, as humans spend so much of our lives focusig on the negative aspects of our problems rather than seeing them for what they are - Our greatest teachers.

Would we have the courage, wisdom and knowledge we possess had we not experienced the setbacks we've faced, the mistakes we made and the suffering we endured? We need to realize that pain is a teacher abd failure is the highway to success. You can never play the guitar without hitting a few wrong notes and you can never ride a bicycle if you are not willing to fall off it a few times. To qoute Patrick Overton, “When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith -- is knowing that one of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on –- or -- You will be taught to fly”.

I too, like most people have encountered my own share of pain while traversing this path of life. It;s during these testing times that I realized that character is shaped, not through life's easiest experiences, but during the toughest ones. It is only during life's most trying times that we discover who we truly are and the undying strength we have within us to over any obstacle. I quote Rainer Maria Rilke, whose words have helped me when life throws one of it's curves on me:

....have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in foreign langauge. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything. At present, you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even notcing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day.

So there you have it. I do hope that in some way possible these words help you to see your troubles as blessings. May you be granted all the strength it takes to face your trials in life and come out with greater wisdom. :-)

Have a nice week ahead.

Budday Wishes.

Today is my friend 'P's Appy Budday.
Here's wishing you a fabulous day
and a nice year ahead.
Happy Birthday gurl!!!


Wishing you a Budday,
That sparkles all day through,
To brighten every moment,
Exactly like you do.

A to Z of HIM!

I have read blog posts on people writing things about themselves from A-Z. It's marvellous to know people introspect so much to write 26 things about themselves.

I decided to write A-Z about HIM. Ther one person who is closest to my heart and whose presence means the world to me.

Aesthetic are his ways of saying how much I mean to him,
Blissful I’m in his graceful company,
Charismatic is the way his eyes shine when he looks at me,
Disastrous would be life if it didn't have his essence,
Enduring is the look in his eyes - that spells 'forever' to me,
Facilitates the best outta me,
Give anything to have him and to love him as he deserves,
Helps me raise my chin up high so I can face the world,
I'd do anything to have him forever, always by my side, so deeply in love,
Joy is what I experience when he's next to me,
Kernel his eyes to my days start,
Light he is to my hard day,
Mesmerizes me - drawing me deeper towards him,

Nights end with his embrace,
Oxygen for me every breath he takes,
Places a soft tune in my head and a smile in my heart too,
Queenly is the way I am treated by him,
Ravishing his royal demeanor,
Swimming through realms of vanity,
Together we shall always be; forever,
Ulterior he is in his every thought
Virtuous in his every action
Wonderful he makes me feel; makes my world go round
Yearn to hear his voice,
ZZoombie I've been, and never noticed.

Nice weekend eh?

Had a fantastic weekend.

Thoda friends ke saath tp, Thoda Amit H. ke saath fighting, thoda saaf safai, ek aur dost ka wedding, ek motivational story, ek exhilarating conversation with 'H', ek aur shyam 'S' ke saath, ek sleepless night.

Aur lots of sleeping in the office on Monday.

What to do, I am like that only.

The need to BARE.

Was going through the morning newspaper - the Bombay Times and was quite disgusted. Why?Because it's not the most alluring sight to see men and women in a few strips of cloth, baring everything that is, for the world to see while sipping your mornin' brew. It's not only in the newspapers. It's everywhere. In song sequences, posters, movies - they all give way to unrealistic, unhealthy portrayals of female sexuality, sexual health, and gratuitous female sexuality and nudity.

Why is it so mandatory to bare skin for a movie or a song to be on the top of charts?

How does Paris Hilton stripping make her movie House of Wax (or any other) any more popular? It's not only in Hollywood? We are following them and are on our way in attaining the title of 'World-Leaders' in the field. Most teens, children as they call themselves Generation Next will snap back at you and looking down their noses explain that it's the most in thing to wear - the lesser the better. How does showing your cleavage in a pub or wearing skimpy outfits make you popular?

And it's not only for wimmen here...there are a lot of men who parade around in all sorts that don't term as "clothing"!

I am not against wearing something "sexy", but when "sexy" comes close to being "nude", that's where I have the problem. Quote the Indian bare-it-all-woman, Ms.Sherawat, "Why should I hide my body when I've worked so hard on making it what it is today?"There's nothing to be ashamed of the human body. But is there a need to prove to the world that you have a marvelous body?


My research says that when the upper strata of the human brain is empty, people make use of such means to gain attention and attract crowd. I am not asking you to cover every centimeter of your skin, like it was done in the olden times, but why to resort to such means? Like everything else on this planet, a need for balance is required with respect to this issue as well. OR (tubelight just lit) are we trying to preserve the culture of our ancestors and hence resorting to leaves and scraps of clothing.

Child Safety: Is this the only way?

I grew up, like everyone else, on a healthy diet of comics - Winnie the Pooh, Dennis the Menace, Noddy, Casper the Friendly Ghost, Asterix and Charlie Brown. No one at that time and age, ever bother bothered about issues like racisim, child abuse and sexual harassment. We read them and enjoyed them. After I grew up, the same comics were read only when I was ill and in bed and Charlie Brown to a little girl I knew. There were ceratin people who decided to take a dark look at these funnies and came up with stuff that said that the characters in these comics were politically incorrect and rascists.

Where has the innocence of childhood vanished?

A couple of weeks ago, I was with a friend at a local mall, and he tried to speak to this cute little girl who came to him on all fours. For him, it was like talking to his own neice, almost the same age. For me, it was fun to see my buddy bend at his substantial middle to chat up with a two pony-tailed, chubby-cheeked, rhapsodic small child who could barely manage to be still. For others, it was something very ordinary. All Indians have an inborn love for small children and will go out of their way to be friendly and make an affectionate contact with them.

But it's an extremely different story in other parts of the world. Stay away from strangers - is the rule. Try to kiss an American baby or pat a British baby - none of whom you've ever met before - and the next you'll find yourself behind the bars with a lawsuit for sexual harassment. Children at a very young age are taught to beware strangers, ofcourse with some justfication. They are hardly allowed to play in gardens/playgrounds or any other public place without adult supervision.

Is this a good thing? Isn't this a loss of human innocence? Or is this the best possible way left, to keep your child safe?

Mother - A Phenomena

There's no emotion quite like that of holding your baby for the first time. Of seeing, hearing and feeling what you carried within you for nine months - a little being, small, vulnerable, wordless. That's when it occurs to her that life has changed irrevocably. That she is now responsible for life besides her own. Just whe the anxiety threatens to overwhelm her, her baby cries out. As she quickly turns to her baby; to take in her arms, the apprehension turns into acceptance. And finally, the woman turns into a MOTHER.


She feels her baby is a great person to talk to . About anything under the sun, for hours and hours on end. There she is, calling her baby by their name, telling her baby about mummy and daddy, and what a pretty baby he/she is. Pointing at things and explaining to her baby what they are. Asking her baby what they'll become when they grow up, or who her Price Charming / Princess would be. There is her baby, listening to solemnly to every word. Then, very seriously, her baby explains her view of life, the universe and everything: 'Goo-goo, ga-ga."

She knows that expression very well. She should. It's the baby's. And now it's hers too. Her little one has got it down pat - the eyes, the smile, everything. She realizes that she is teaching her little one more than she thinks. Her little one is watching her every move, learning how to behave in the world. It's funny at first. Then she begins to worry about what she is teaching her baby. That her baby is learning things he/she is not supposed to. Because the last thing she wants is that her baby turns out like herself.

It's natural for her to call out her baby by her name. And it's even more natural for her baby to not understand. One day, she'll call out to her baby. And her baby would turn his/her pretty little head to look at her. As if to say, "Yes, Momma; I'm here." She realizes that her baby has been slowly understanding that one familiar combination of sound refers to him/her. That her baby's just begun to discover his/her own identity. What she has now is no longer a little bundle of likes, dislikes, moods and quirks. It's a little person.

One day, her baby decides to make some travel plans. Accordingly, her little one disappears every time her back is turned. Crawling off to his/her next destination, criss-crossing the house, covering as much as twenty kilometers a day. Much to her concern. Her baby does not see the dangers she does. What if he/she bumps her head on the cupboard? Or crawls right off the bed? Or (heaven forbid!) crawls towards the stairs? That's when she finds herself taking on the next great motherhood role - the BODYGUARD.

After weeks of cruising along holding onto furniture, alternately standing up and falling down, the great day arrives. Her little one climbs to his/her feet. And bravely, with a look of intense concentration on his/her face, he/she takes his/her first tottering steps into the world. Walking comfotably - if a trifle unsteadily - into her waiting arms. He/She has just achieved independent mobility, and their face glows. But for her the moment is bittersweet. Because it's the end of babyhood, and the begining of childhood.

She is a MOTHER. A word that means the world to ME.

Pop-the-pill

Good Morning Sir! I am here to speak of a wonderful product that my company has made. Can you please spare some time for it? I ascertain that after hearing about the advantages of the product you would not be dissappointed. And it is has been rated as the best selling product of late. I am sure you would be tempted to try one, only if you could spare some of your precious moments

OK, let me explain. Can you tell me the model that you are using, Sir? Oh!No! You are using a jaded model, Sir. You need to upgrade. Let me abreast you the virtues of the latest state of the art model that our firm is selling. It's not available in stores and you are amongst the lucky few, who have been chosen to try this product.

And plus, this model comes with the warranty that you'd never run out of things, you'd never be alone, you'd never run out of optimism and the Quality Assurance Team have tried-and-tested this product for pessimistic bugs. All our customers are happy, and there is a not a single life that we sold that has been returned to us.

Like all other companies, we offer after sales service, free for the first three years and an additional piece of your soul for each yearly routine service, thereafter. If you do not have a soul to pay, you need not worry, we'd extract a bit of it from you sometime. I am sure there is a bit of it left in you somewhere. We'll sure work it out and make it worthwhile.

Why am I not using it? Sir, it's our company policy, they do not allow us to use the products we make. Our market research team has shown a rise in Sales, and the same can be ruined with too much of optimism, if we start using the product.

Yes, Sir! You can pay via any medium. We will remove a bit of your soul over the years that you live until you die a happy and contended person. Hope that you have a satisfying experience with Tablet LIFE hereafter..

Thank you.

What's in your bag?

Since Junior college I have always carried oversized bags. To college, to work, to outings… everywhere. My mum wondered what I stuff in it, so I set about ‘cleaning’ it. The BLP (bottomless pit) revealed:

1. A telephone diary, a scribbles diary

2. A pouch containing strips of basic medicine, band-aids, cotton etc.

3. An empty mobile cover, mobile charger, mobile handsfree, mobile, hand tissues, an empty change purse, a handful of change from the bottom of the bag, wallet stuffed with bills, ATM statements, Credit cards, Debit cards etc...

4. 2 ball point pens (black and blue apiece) and one highlighter (green).

5. A miniature sewing kit, a bunch of safety pins and a couple of U-clips.

6. 1 Halls ki goli, half a packet of Polo mints and some eclairs.

7. A nail filer, 2 bottles of nail enamles, 1 lip liner, 2 lipsticks, 3 assorted clips, two hair clips and one comb.

8. One miniature bottle of my fav. perfume (Eternity by CK).

9. Face wash, a tube of fair 'n' lovely cream and lip balm.

10. Keys to my desk at work, my house keys and cupboard keys.

11. The wrappers of Wrigley’s chewing gum, Lehar Kurkure, Marie and Bourbon biscuits… none of which I got to see when they were full.

Inspired by Keshi, I have decided to list my bizarre habits and quirks.

They are in no particular order...

1. I’m a hand talker. I don’t mean I do sign language. I mean I will be on the phone and will be talking about something and my hands will mimic the motion, even though the other person can not see me at all. It’s completely an unconscious movement and I’ll often not realize I’m doing it until I finish making the motion with my hands. 'S' used to always tease me on this.

2. When I’m home alone I put loud music on and dance around like a fool.

3. I have an obsession of cleaning my things and keeping them in a neat order. (Donno whether this is categorized as 'weird')

4. I pick my cuticles and bite my lower lip.

5. I will turn on the TV even though I’m not really watching it. I just need the background noise.

6. I will not eat beetroot. I will pick them out of food. If I come to your house and you serve me beetroot, please understand, I just cannot eat them. The texture and flavour are indescribably awful. I shudder at the mere thought of letting a beetroot pass my lips.

7. When someone’s voice or way of talking sounds funny to me I, almost involuntarily, imitate them under my breath. Jeezzzz....the 'MEAN' ME!

8. I can't fall asleep if I see any insect(s)in my house. I am absolutely petrified of insects no matter how small or big. They scare the bejeezus out of me. If one gets on me I go into panic mode which is not pretty.

9. For temperature control I usually sleep with one leg above the sheets and one under.

10. Even if I'm having a cold drink or water, I have to put ice in it.

For my friend.

As I write this....a dear friend of mine is hurting...feeling that nothing is working for her...that all her efforts to save her relationship have gone in vain. She feels like giving up. So I am writhing this...only for HER..hoping that when she reads this...she might see things in a different way.

Dear Friend,

We both know that life is never easy. Each of us have gone through difficult and odd times in our separate lives. We both have told each other - it's neither here or neither there. We all make mistakes in life - getting into wrong marriages, working in the wrong place, making wrong friends, living bad decisions. But can know how things will turn out until we are not a part of it.? Never. There is always an end, for sure, because nothing in this world is left midstream.

Stop here and think for a while - Life does not stand still for anyone. We all have to make choices - move on or fall back and be left behind. With all past experiences, one can see life better with fresh interests, understanding, appreciation and wisdom. This journey continues. It's lifelong. Life is a continuous play - of giving and receiving. Bitter and sweet, success and failure, good and bad, ugly and beautiful, joy and sadness, high and low - you will often find yourself at one end or the other. This is LIFE ---difficult, rough and imperfect but RICH. There is no secret to living life. It's just about keeping in step to the beating of the drum - to the music played by that ONE drummer.

To quote:“ One day we will find our place, for all things fall into place, For all things have a place, in the greater scheme of things.”- Fr. Johnny. True to this...one day these fractured bits of our lives will fall in place. We were never promised a world of roses and ease, were we? I sometimes look back often to see what's gone past behind me. I do this only to appreciate where I am today; What I am today. The past, gruesome in some and excellent in another, has created my passions, interests, desires, expectations and dreams in one package that people see, interact with and relate to each day.

Whatever you do with your life is purely your decision. I, (or no one for that matter) can tell you what is best for you to do. NO ONE KNOWS BETTER HOW THINGS TRULY ARE UNLESS THEY DON"T EXPERIENCE IT THEMSELVES. Yet, the eternal truth - there are always 2 sides to a coin ---Yours and the other person's. No matter how you feel justified in your stand, the other end also has his/her story to tell. And so goes every tale told by man.

It's not your fault and neither his. It's just the way things are - You love him and he doesn't. You want him to love you - but he can't and he won't. How on earth can he give you something which isn't even there in the 1st place? He's been trying to tell you all the while...but you didn't understand. Give him credit for his honesty. Wake Up! You can't puch love. Neither can you beg or plead for it. So let go!

Start to develop yourself. Use your God-given talents to find out new challenges, new meanings and new directions. Find out what you are good at. Never mind the kind of relationship you were in - what matters is YOU. Move on and reclaim the right to be you. Don't waste your time on things you can't resolve. But, put all your energies on what is within your ability to control. No one can hurt us bad enough to make us sulk all day. Look inward - you will find hope. Hope (and so do we) wants you to believe that there is something greater to look forward to ---bigger than our small lives. Better and good.

It's time to laugh again.

Regards,
Nikita.

Contolled Diet and Fruit Cream for Dessert.

Last nite on the dinner table:

'I read an article in the newspaper on healthy food. Henceforth we would have healthy food', papa told momma

'I got fruits from the market today. Do you wanna have some?', momma asked.

Papa: I am going to have fruits for dinner.

Momma: Fine. You go ahead. I and Niks don't need to diet.

Papa: Can you cut the fruits you got into small pieces? Add more of bananas, grapes and apples.

Momma: Ok.

Papa: Can you also whip up some fresh cream and add powdered sugar to it?



Momma: For what?

Papa: Would add it to the fruits.

Momma: OK.

Papa: Do we have waffles at home? If not, can you shallow fry some bread crumbs? To just add it to the cream.

Momma: Ok.

Papa: Do we have Vanilla Icecream at home?

Momma: Yes. Shall add it to the sweetened fruit cream and crispy bread crumbs.

Papa: Thanks. *All smiles*

Momma: Is there anything else you'd want?

Papa: No. I am on a controlled diet. Just get the fruit cream. And yes, don't forget to add strawberries and milkmaid to it.

Simple, yet so profound.

Quote Robin Sharma from 'The Monk who sold his Ferrarri':

"Every moment you spend thinking of other peoples dreams, you take time away from your own".

Can I make a tiny wish? A real tiny one? Can I call upon the stars to freeze my life here and not allow me to move at all? Even after howling and wailing about how things are, I am happy the way they are. I love the people around me even with all the endless fights and arguments that I have with them. Improvement does come at a cost, doesn't it? I am a little child asking her momma, "Can we stay here for good?. It's really comfortable in here."

People have warned me, "Do not tread where you are not sure of the ground. Stop there." But what is life without risks? Push yourself a little further, take another step towards the edge, and then another, and at the bottom you'll see dismantles bits of rocks with the fading echos of all those warnings. A game between chance and sensibility. Sensibility will be kissed goodbye and chance will have it's say, one day. Someday.

But can we really afford to stop? What would happen if we do? The very thought just scares me. We can't stop. We strive for better and higher. One half of me is lagging behind, it cannot keep up with the other half who is becoming nothing but a tinier speck at the horizon. The former does nothing accept hold the latter back from the last step. The last and final step to freedom. Goodbye to mundaneness.