An old saying : Wrapping is a thousand times easier than draping.

To celebrate the festive spirit of Diwali, we come to office dressed in our traditional best. Wow. Great, absolutely wonderful.

So, I get up early in the morning, manage to leave on time wearing the quintessential saree.

The saree has a life of its own. It changes shape, bunches together and opens out to display its embroidered pallu like a show off. At one time it sticks on to me like a lover and the very next minute it loosens itself and has moved. Such behaviour should not be pardoned and should be punishable.

Saari Duniya ek taraf, Niks ki saree ek taraf.

Hail the safety pin(s) that saved my day.


On a different note:

Wishing all you guys a VERY HAPPY DIWALI AND A PROSPEROUS NEW YEAR.



~May Ganesha shower u with His choicest blessings today and forever.

~May this festival of lights bring tons of joy, happiness, prosperity, luck & warmth in your lives.
~May success be yours and time favours you.
~May opportunities knock your door whole year throughout and you make best use of that.
~May you get all the inner strength to fight the odds, year across.
~May all the happy moments be here to cherish forever.

Shubh Deepavali ..... light the lamps of love & affection.

I pray..

Dear God,



Please can food be calorie free? So that I can eat all that I want, how much ever I want and yet not put on an inch.



And speaking of holidays, festivals and bank holidays should NOT be allowed to fall on weekends.



Can I have co-operation from you and the stars on these please!



Thank You.

Knock! Knock...Can I come in?

It's 6:30 AM. My phone rings. I'm woken up with a call from S. And I'm really not a morning person; unless you count 11:59 A.M as morning..tht's when my chakras and grey cells come to life.



Arrgghhh!! So I was saying, it's 6:30 AM and have S on the line. I was in the middle of an early morning dream of Brad Pitt. He's covered in soap; washing his car..oohhhhhh



Anyways, "Hello", I say. "You sound so sexy in the morning, nuts. I am sure you'd look sexy too. I smiled. S, my 6 o' clock friend, my punching bag, my complaint box, a very very good pal and also my shrink. The one person whose always walked besides me, shared my agony and exhilaration.



S: "You answer the following question and you win urself a wonderful breakfast with the only man in your life. How does a man show he is planning for the future"?



Me: It's an old one, S. He buys 2 cans of beer.



S: Perfecto!



Me: Where will the divine union be?



S: Barrista. With me, ur fav. coffee and choco brownie. See you at 9:00.



9:00 AM



It was a beautiful October morning and the cafe was buzzing with people. I and S are seated at the farthest end.



Me: Wot's all this about?



S: I've got an offer from XYZ. I am going to be an RJ!



Me: Wow! Tht deserves a hug. Congratulations



S: Thanks.



S: Nuts, behind every successful man is a woman. Is it 'cause wimmen go for only successful men??? *laughs*



Me: Huh! Was tht a joke? It wasn't funny. How I hate you when you laugh like that.



S: I just wanted to cheer you up.



Me: I smiled.



S: OK, listen to this one. You know why does it take 1 million sperms to fertilize a single egg? Because they don’t stop and ask for directions.



Me: He!He!



My laughter made him smile. He was happy. I guess this is how it is when you really like somone. When someone is close and dear to you. I, for sure, know that he is too precious to me just as I am to him. In this world of "instants" we had an "instant" bonding. He was my laughter machine. What will I do if he went away? He had become a habit.



Me: S, why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, loving and caring?



S: 'Cause they already have boy-friends. :-|



S: You know what nuts, the best thing about you besides being pretty is that you are a wonderful person. I haven't met anyone as wild as you in my life.



Me: *blushing*



S: Have you not heard, “Before you find your handsome prince, You've got to kiss a lot of frogs.”



Me: Yeah, right.



Me: You sure have an attitude problem.



S: Mizz, you have a perception problem.



S: Sometimes I feel, how come we've never fallen in love and thought of getting married.



Me: *Bewildered look* . Silence. What is it that he meant to say?



S: You made me fall in love with you.



Me: S



S: I know my name.



Me: It's not possible.



S: Y, nuts. We've been friends for years now. I always stopped myself 'cause you liked someone else. But today u've let him go. So..knock...knock! Can I come in??



Me: S..u r a great friend. And always shall be.



S: I love you nuts, have always and will always.



Me: It's 11:00. Time to go.



S: Yep. We meet tommorrow again. Does nething change b/w us after me having said this?



Me: Nopes. You are my sweetheart and shall always remain.



Ok. Bye.

Ouch.......it hurts.

You, thought it all.
You, said it all.
I, FELT it all.

You mattered to me. I've known you for quite some time...funny how your statements still hurt so bad?.

There are very few people who make their way into my world. I am absolutely cautious. And, contradictorily, too trusting. I love, care, prod, analyze, understand these people and put them into neat packages. These are the people whom I know I can pick over coffee anytime, have hour long conversations; a r'ship that is to be sensed, a r'ship so deep that there are more feelings that words. People with whom I have a "connection" with. The few that I accept as "friends" (read as family). They are never subjected to scrutiny. People whom I love so much that I would go any lengths to do anything for them. I allow them to take me for granted.

I would lie if I say I dn't expect anything from them. I do. I expect love. Not in the same way that I do, neither the same intensity, but in their own way that they can. I do feel shattered when I don't see it coming.

And one day, something happens and I harden myself and cut those very people from my life.

Wht is it that the people who matter so much inevitably say something that makes your heart ache like it'll never stop or never heal? Why is it that the r'ships that I feel so intensely about..burn theselves out? Why does the "balanced" r'ship not feel worth the while? Do I love too much and yet too less?

Of life-partners and the "process" of discovering them.

P.S: The post is quite loooong. Read it at ur own risk. Didn't say I didn't warn you enuf

It's been six months now since I know A. It's been a pleasure knowing him. A self-confessed adrenaline junkie! Personification of a typical Capricorn. Independent, confident, strong willed, hardworking, unemotional, shrewd, practical, responsible and persevering.

His mood swings; he becomes surprisingly and suddenly witty and subtle for the quiet, might seem reserved to some, and has a tendency to ruin things by unexpected and utterly irresponsible bouts of behaviour. He can make you laugh through twenty different ways, multiplied by twenty one to make you cry and deals with six different people in five different ways!! Goofs up big time and fills his routine quota of regrets.

And he is also Single. Not actually. He's dating V. V and A have been good pals since almost 2 yrs now, ever since A's university days. Dating V, according to A, is a process whereby which he can ascertain whether she is eligible to be his life partner. They "seem" to know each other well; spend hours on the phone talking about everything under the sun, but aren't sure whether they are made for each other.

When we talk of a life partner, we usually think of that one "special" individual that we fall in love with and would life happily ever after. A person who touches your life. A person who shows you to yourself.

Close relationships, according to me, either can start or evolve into, a partnership. A relationship offers a constant reminder of the work that both the people involved have to do. It's the people involved who can transform an ordinary relationship into a precious gift of life time partnership. It's all in our hands. Relationships according to me is an act of playfulness. It's all about intimate sharing, where parts of our shadows are also exposed, sometimes, to test each other's degree of acceptance. A sense of belonging - a face of love.

Coming back to A. He might also live-in (move-in) with V. They are trying to work "this" aspect of their relationship out, to get to know each other "BETTER". He says the intention behind this kinda set-up is to NOT satisfy his physical needs, but to assay whether they are meant for each other or No! It's like, "Try before you buy", "Rent-a-partner", or like, "Buy today, Use it and return tommorrow. Sorry, there would be no refund policy upon return"! Agreed that a live-in relationship is about two people living together out of mutual consent with no legitimate bond whatsoever. No wedding, no security, no alimony. A says, "Niks, what's the big deal about living in"?? Feel like SCREAMING out loud and telling him, "Lack of commitment". A relationship where a person is free to walk out of it as and when he/she pleases. No one is questionable to the other. Darn, it sounds so peachy to ME!! According to me, it's a relationship with "all" the the fringe benefits of matrimony and no legal attachments. The thought just disgusts ME!

I understand that it's important to know your partner before you get married, and even if they do, it doesn't mean they ARE going to live happily with each other. Is a LIVE-IN relationship the "ONLY" way to get to know your partner before you tie the knot? Can a LIVE-IN relationship be a substitute to marriage?

Marriage is about hard-work, patience and compromise. It is NOT about finding the right partner but about learning to live happily with whomsoever you have been paired up with.

Reminds me of Shakespeare's sonnet 116,
SONNET 116
Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

What say you??

Too True, Too Often

Too often we don't realize

What we have until it is gone

Too often we wait too late to say

"I'm sorry - I was wrong."



Sometimes it seems we hurt the ones

We hold dearest to our hearts

And we allow foolish things

To tear our lives apart.



Far too many times we let

Unimportant things into our minds

And then it's usually too late

To see what made us blind.



So be sure that you let people know

How much they mean to you

Take that time to say the words

Before your time is through.



Be sure that you appreciate

Everything you've got

And be thankful for the little things

in life that mean a lot.



--Thnkx Amit.H for sending this to me.

How I wish we could stop certain ppl from coming into our lives. Especially if they were destined to leave. But we do have choices, don't we? Yeah, but sometimes we don't. You are put in a situation wherein you are asked to choose between the devil and a road full of cactus to tread on. You are going to get hurt either ways.

You seeped through and through to my bones and from thereon to my soul. I know...it was tooo soon...

Someday this heartahe will go. There will be no pain. My heart will grow cold after a while. It will be alright.

Until then, you remain....as a distant memory...so all who know me and see me..will know that you have been with me...ONE TIME...some time.....

Was alone at home in the afternoon. Sometimes you require time..to think for yourself. I wonder what is it about we humans that we always venture into situations which are dangerous; into situations that are doomed with failure?



Is there anything such as will and free-choice in this thing called " LIFE". Is life a chagrin for everyone? Is life predertimed for us in each step; with one choice leading to a consice conclusion? Are we our own enemies?



'A' says I have always been judgemental. Mebbe. There are certain things that I would NEVA do, because "I" feel it is wrong. Is it wrong to lay your own rules and live by them? There are certain things about me that 'A' denounces. He deprecates most of my princilpes. Wot the heck? Y is it so important that rules made by me should be in consensus with him? I am not asking him to live his life on rules made by me.!!!



I wonder was life always like that or I have just smelled reality, or is it that just in recent times the world has become a shaky place to live. You confront the situations that you always wanted to avoid, the people whom you love the most would just walk past (read as over) you, your best buddy will stab you from behind. And then when you introspect deep within, u'd realize that there is a dark side inside you too. Your cryptic twin..the devil you always condemned.



Even when your head tells you something, your heart, the most trusted organ, whom you trust upon to lead you through , will be a traitor. The heart..it welcomes an unknown vistor, who speaks lies with such diligence, disembarks your life, and challenges you to deny your true feelings.



What is the best thing to do? How does one learn when there are no guidelines? When all the advice you receive and all the Literature tells you to listen to your heart, but your HEAD, the practical one...would not allow you to take the necessary steps and allow you to rest in peace. When life hangs suspended, actions comes to a halt and you are on guard constantly. I have been spending so much of time these days on the fringes of sanity and the best part is it is not funny anymore.



I am tired of finding explanations and rational interpretations. I wish I knew, like so many other things, but right now I am backtracking. I am way too lost in fighting my own self. I am my own worst enemy.

Happy Dussehra

May God bless you with happiness all the year through.

Beyond you...

No matter how smart you are but you can stil make mistakes.
No matter how fast you are someone slower may still be able to beat you.
No matter how strong you are but your vulnerability can throw you on the mat.

Everything that seems right can go wrong and ther are times when you get away with just bout everything you do.

Life is short, sometimes unfair..but yet a long-long journey....

It is all about choices..the onces we make.

God speaks "Anything is possible". Go closer. And the stmnt ends at "Conditions Apply".

Life is a journey..no one knows the destination. We are all travellers till the end of time.

What is life? A game, an imprisonment or a mad-house?

What lies beyond feelings, lonliness, company, love and its permutations and combinations?

Do you know what lies beyond nothingness?

What are you searching for??

Beyond you.. lies what?

Here's me gng down memory lane..once again...

--->I recall those days spent on the terrace, under the buliding water tank, on those pipes. That place was our headquarters; we would do hours and hours of plotting and planning of how we'd spend our holidays.

--->I recount those days when all the children from the society would gather in the building compound to play. We played and played and played some more. The highlight of our lives was the game of chor-police and ghar-ghar.

--->I remember birthdays. They were the most awaited days. Distributing chocolates to the whole class and all the teachers, wearing new clothes and feeling proude of being a year older.

--->I remember the times we fought..like there was no tommorrow. But we were back togther as thick pals the next day. There were no grays in our lives; either you love someone or you don't. It was all black and white.

--->I remember exam time..unit tests were most hated and semesters more so. Learning pages of information to spill it all over the answer sheets. Feeling happy on the last day of exams, welcoming the summer vacations, treating ourselves to ice-creams and playing away in the evening.

--->I remember the monsoon. Wading thru mud pools in gum boots and rain coats. Monsoon was meant to get wet...change and get wet again.

--->I remember my fav. teacher..Mr.Ganatra. He left school for a better venture. We all had given him a souvenir. Wonder whether he still has it.

--->I remember the days when luch time was spent running between classrooms and Tiffin box was eaten during breaks or on our way home (to avoid shoutings from mom). Free periods were a God-sent and remarks in the calender meant signature from the parent.

--->I remember the time when punishment was standing on the classroom bench or kneeling down outside the class. Library meant Enid Blyton's, Nancy Drews and Hardy Boys.

--->I remember school picnics. A trip to Aarry Milk colony and Chota Kashmir. Camping was at Mahableshwar.

--->I remember Sports Day. Winning was an extra point in the "Blue House" kitty. Annual Day....the day of showcasing one's talent.

I remember my childhood. I hope today's childern have just as many memories of their childhood. I wish their memories are not virtual and are more real.