Love Marriages vs. Arranged Marriages.

This was one of the topics that was on my mind since a long time, but I never ended up discussing it here.

It's really funny the way our opinions keep changing. Being an absoulutely conventional-minded person right from my cradle, I always was in favour of arranged marriages. I don't recall what exactly my arguments were in favour of them, but the fact that my parents had an arranged marriage (father-like-son syndrome) may have everything to do with it. However, my opinions changed some years ago.

Coming to the present, I would not vote for any. I fail to understand how a 'type' of marriage can guarantee success or failure of it.

I know of people who give examples of certain successful marriages, and some who give examples of love relationships that turned into matrimony. There are many examples to the opposite effect too in both cases, but these they would claim as exceptions, depending upon the side they are favouring.

I have come to believe that be it a love marriage or an arranged one, both hold equal changes, as long as certain ingredients are present and maintained.

If two people in a r'ship confess themselves in love with each other, I would have wondered on the reasons why a marriage between these two people was successful. It cud have been just pure luck. They may continue to be in love with each other for however long, but don't they also say, "Love is blind"?. In this blind state the couple would carry on accepting and madnifying each other's perfections and ignoring the not-so-desirable traits, and then one day reality, or rather, marriage, sets in. They would ponder on why they ever saw each other in the first place, but the answers are more than obvious.

On the arranged marriage front, two people meet each other, are more or less satisfied with each other's physical attributes, speak a few words, and confess being pleased. The rest is taken care of by the parents and the d-day is done with.

The couple slowly and steadily realize the incompatibility between them and that there is no common ground where they can meet. No wonder they never met before.

I feel that whether it's a 'love' or an 'arranged' marriage, as long as there is trust, mutual acceptance, understanding, a practical approach to assess each other's compatibilities and a conscious effort, to make the r'ship work, no matter how hard the effort...not only for now...but forever...there stands every chance that it will succeed.




I have always believed in emotions tested by time....not the momentary flames that ignite, burn and flicker away...but calm, composed, constant and always present.